Tag Archives: pets

Structured rambling


If the past few weeks has taught me only one thing, it is that time waits for no one.   I have some serious goals for myself, including getting the book I have been writing for years, done!     So I am setting structure for myself.  I will be painting, walking, writing each day.

I have always steered clear of structure.   I guess I think if I don’t do it, I am a free agent and no one is telling me what to do.   But doh!   What if this is good for me?  And I know it is, so get out of your own head and make it happen!!!  (me to self)

Thoughts today have been on my mom.   Missing her.   Her Siberian Irises are in full bloom, as well as the Old Fashioned Bleeding Heart, and more.      I talk to her when I am outside because that is where she spent the majority of time when she was here.

As true with any loss, if only we could have “one more” everything.    I was fortunate to have her for so long, but it wasn’t long enough.  And then a friend and I were walking our dogs and talking about how difficult it is when a parent dies.   It really is so hard.   The day after my mother died I woke up and the world was a different place for me.  There is no other way to describe it.  I felt vulnerable, because my biggest protector in life was no longer here.  My girlfriend described it this way.    When you have your family, your parents, it is like you have this safe house with loved ones.  When a parent dies it is like the roof is blown off.     I nodded.   Vulnerability.

Those closest to me know how difficult the first year has been without her.   Winter was hell.   Also as true with loss is the painful reality that we feel on the first birthday, holiday, without them.   The “firsts” of everything hurts.   Sometimes I feel her essence and I am very grateful for this.   Until you lose a parent, you will not fully grasp how hard it is.   The day we lose my father will be a frightening day for me for several reasons.   I pray it isn’t soon, but I also pray he will not suffer with this “Lewy Body Dementia” shit.    But I know too much on it.

I have been thinking about life.   You are raised, schooled, taught, and then you start your own life.   You find a spouse, or significant others, and  most will have their own families, children, and then grandchildren, etc.    With this life you are constantly growing, learning, because there is no quicker way to learn than to teach something!   I wasn’t able to have children.  So my life has been different, but not bad.    I believe in “What’s meant to be will be”.   Children for me, was not meant to be.   Have long since accepted that.   But I have been active in my nephew and nieces life and always will be.  They bring me much joy, they are entertaining, they are perfectly imperfect beings.  I just love them.    But they are busy with their own lives.    As they should be!

A lot of my friends are single.   A lot of my friends are childless.  Many of us have furry kids.   Lilly brings me much joy.    It wasn’t that long ago I had two dogs and three cats.  I used to say “Every single self employed artist needs five animals!”    But truly, they were so important to me, and I was fortunate to have them, and had friends and my mom to help me here.   My animals probably spent equal time with my mom when I travel taught.    It was funny to see the “loyalty” shift back and forth.

With the exception of my australian shepherd “Brody”, all others were rescues.   And it’s interesting when you rescue an animal, or so you think, and then you realize that they rescued YOU!!   I had to put my cat Zoe down because she was sick and I didn’t have the money to get her treated.  It has tortured me.   I feel like I failed her, and while she lived 14-15 years, my other two cats were 19 when they died.   Anyway, I prayed daily for them all to stay healthy (I had adopted them when I was in a relationship and we lived together).    Little did I know Brody would outlive him!

Rambling, and that’s okay.    Doesn’t matter if you are single, married, straight, gay, white, black, I hope you do have loved ones in your life.  I hope you have experienced this.   I believe there is only a couple things we take when you die… love and love!    I hope when it is my turn, I will take with me much love.   Peace to all reading this.      xx


Sophie (Loren)


It’s not always easy doing “the right thing”.   The past week I have been thinking about a german shepherd that I rescued, and eight months later placed into gsd rescue program.   The past couple of days I’ve been thinking of her non stop.  When I went on facebook tonight, I realized why.  It was one year ago today that I placed her.

I didn’t want another dog, but she needed help, so I took her in.   She was just 14 months old, missing half of her fur, her ears were angry red, she cried if you touched them.   She scratched herself ALL THE TIME.   Sophie had major allergies and did so well on GOOD dog food ($50 a bag).  But I didn’t have the means to give her this.

The morning she left we laid on the couch together.  She rested her head in my chest and just looked up at me with those big brown eyes.   I couldn’t hold back the tears.  Goodbyes are so hard.    In my life I have learned, even goodbyes that bring relief are not easy, and for me, not painless.  I’ve had a few.

I’m trying to hold onto gratitude.   How well she looked, last time I saw pictures of her, and how happy she looked.  She was one smart dog.   She was just so big and strong, and at the time I was having physical problems, well still do, but I remember how bruised I got a couple of times with her.  She didn’t even know her size, her strength.   The fastest dog I’ve ever seen, and my aussie was a tennis ball and Frisbee chaser.  Sophie had it all over him, hands down.

So I’ve shed a few tears tonight, thinking about her, I do miss her.  I never thought I would give up an animal, ever, always had them.   Last year at this time I had two dogs and three cats.  Every woman needs this much responsibility!   Now I have one dog and two cats, and my cats are geriatric.  In fact, my Maine Coon who spends summers outside, hasn’t shown her face in the past couple days.  I am concerned.  But I remember being concerned one time when I hadn’t seen her for a week (We are talking probably 12-14 years ago now), and she came crawling back.  I think she got locked into a building across the road, and finally found her escape.   I am thinking back on the tears I shed that day when she came home, tears of joy.

My little terrier was groomed the other day.  I typically do it.   Can’t say as I like the looks of her head the way it is, I prefer the ragdoll look, but she sure does smell good, and her fur is so soft.   Unlike my aussie who pranced around and thought he was the cats meow after he was groomed, she ran under the ottoman and stayed there for the day.

I know I did right by Sophie.  I know because it was one very hard decision to make and follow through with.  I’ve found that doing “the right thing” is typically the hardest choice, and the most difficult to do!

Time to go to bed, and hopefully sleep will come.   I hope! I hope! I hope!   And I hope you have a great day!

Secret stashes


The past year I’ve really been cleaning out my house.   As an artist, I don’t want to throw anything away because I “might need it”.   And wouldn’t you know it, I’ve tossed things I’ve had for a decade, only to find 2 weeks later that I wish I had it!  Yes, I’m a mental case, but that isn’t the point I’m trying to make.  Not even sure what is!  Oh yes, DE cluttering!

It’s hard for me to believe that I’ve been living in this house since 1988.    So you can imagine the collection I had.  I’ve never been materialistic, except when it comes to art supplies, music.   Don’t get me wrong, I love nice things, and my taste is certainly larger than my pocket book, but I have a knack of finding things inexpensively.  I also do not compromise on some things.   I don’t want to listen to music through tin sounding speakers, or bead with acrylic.  I paint with acrylic, but I bead with gem stones, crystal.  No plastic for me!     Add to this my return to needlecraft design, I rarely buy acrylic yarn.  I want fibers.  Wool, silk, cotton!       Felting has brought new joy into my life.   As the snow accumulated last winter, I made these sweet roses and flowers, felted them, and they sit in a box next to me.  A little box of sunshine just for looking!  I guess what I’m saying is, I’m fussy?

So now you know I’m a craft hoarder.   But I don’t think I am.   Honestly, if you saw what I got rid of?    I am downsizing, however, and numerous surfaces, canvas, tools that I no longer use are going to be going to a good home.    So I have piles started.  Piles that are going to the hospice thrift shop, a pile started for a couple of friends that I know would appreciate this stuff, a pile to go to the Senior Center, and a large pile to try to figure out where the heck to put it!

But something very cool is happening as I go through this process.   For everything I get rid of, I am gaining back freedom.  I don’t know how else to describe it.   I feel lighter, and lighter each box that leaves, or is scheduled to leave.     It’s kind of funny when you think about it.  We spend years accumulating things, and yet it feels so good to get RID of things!  One less project “owning me”.  Every project I had planned to do and didn’t, owns a bit of me.  By getting rid of it, it frees up my head and time, gives me what feels like really good juju!

There is also this fun aspect to cleaning out.   Things I forgot I had, or did.   It is like a treasures box!   Now if only I could find some moola!   But I did find brushes, brushes and more brushes.  A secret little stash I forgot about from days of working with several brush companies and a box of samples a girlfriend sent to me that include some kick butt dry brushes.    It’s funny how a finding like this can be so inspiring.    When cleaning out my Uncle’s apartment last year after his passing, I found some things that he had held onto that made me smile.  imageOne being the book I authored in the early 2000’s.  Going to try to attach a picture of it, but no promises!      I’ve always had an Americana style, and my work typically represents country living.   Yep, the possum is on the stove top boiling!    I was particularly proud of this book, because my sister was able to see that, and the first time my artwork was on the cover of a magazine.     She was one of my two biggest fans, supporters when I started down this path of decorating painting.

In one box I found a toy of my Brody boys.  An Australian shepherd who died a couple of years ago.   That dog was something else.   I miss him everyday, but I know I was truly blessed to have such an intelligent, articulate, bossy dog in my life for almost 13 years, but it’s never long enough, is it?   Finding his toy hurt at first, like I was just sucker punched.  But it quickly turned to smiles as I found pictures of him, and remembered his funny ways.   My bossy aussie.brody 002

This is an adventure!    One with fabulous memories and pride, which I choose to look at versus the mess that my studio has been.   I really have NO business being in business for myself.   Honestly, I am more organized than I have ever been, but that really isn’t saying much!

Today’s song….     U2 “Pride”,  Hope you’ve had a great day!

Doing the right thing…


Six months ago I adopted/rescued an 18 month old German Shepherd by the name of Sophie.   She is as sweet as can be, loves the other animals, great with my niece and her best friend (Age 10).   The first two months I had her a girlfriend gave me two bags of food, Royal Canin, which cost $50-$60.  I got her weight up, as you could see her ribs.   I managed to get her ears straightened out with drops, bag balm, and her fur was growing back nicely (She was missing 2/3  of her fur).    I kept her on the good food for another 2 months, but could not afford the expense this past month.   In this month she has taken a few steps back, skin wise.  I’m so upset about it.   She scratches and bites herself, I took care of this with Epsom salts, it helped the scratching.  Benadryl did nothing for this.  She has dry flaky skin and her fur is coming out by handfuls.

I have all rescue animals, 3 cats and 2 dogs.  Every single woman needs five animals, don’t you think?  NOT!   I have all I can do to feed myself let alone all the animals, but trust me, they live well.   I do take very good care of them and they are all spoiled, shocker eh?   I have been chatting with a friend who has a german shepherd, she works with gsd rescue.   The first few weeks I had her was challenging, house training her, getting her body weight up, the itching to cease.  I made it through some major hurdles with her, with the support of this friend and others.   Now I’ve come to the realization that she would be better off in a home where she will get the best medical care.  To say I’m sad is an understatement.

I have strong moments when I feel like I can do this, other times not at all.   Last week I had decided I was keeping her, would figure out a way, came home and she had peed and crapped in the house.    I actually scolded her but laughed… Oh sure… do this AFTER I decide to keep you!  That was not a deal breaker.   She has wormed her way into my heart, and my terriers heart.  While a major pain in the ass at times, now in the terrible 2’s, I feel like someone has placed a bag of cement on my chest.   I don’t want to give her up.   I just don’t.   I have to do the right thing and place her with a family that will and have the means to take care of her.   It’s the right thing to do.  So why does it feel so wrong?  The worst and most painful thing in this situation is her sadness.  Intelligent, intuitive, she senses this.   She looks at me with sad eyes, and rests now always near me.   I feel like I am abandoning her, and as a person who struggles with abandonment issues, this pains me.

All of my cats are geriatric, one failing rapidly.   It is hard watching her health fail, though she is as happy as ever, as mischievous as ever.  As long as her quality of life is there, I will do my best with her.  I do not believe in letting animals suffer.  Not at all.   This belief is the impetus in making the decision to place Sophie elsewhere.

Send me good energy, thoughts, say some prayers for me, please.  I’m going to need all to muster up the strength to do this.


Faith, Love, Brody


I’m often asked “How do you choose what you write about?”  Well, that’s easy…whatever is on my mind!   Typically something will happen that will trigger thoughts during that day, other times I share on what ails me, pleases me.

One safe topic is the weather and we are having BEAUTIFUL weather here in Vermont.  Low 70’s, blue skies, a nice breeze that feels like silk on my skin.  The dogs are delighting in it as well, hanging out the windows of my jeep, running around like banches having fun.  The signs of winter have passed and far from my mind, well except saying that!   Trees and bushes are budding, flowers are breaking soil and just for this day I am grateful to be living in Vermont.

For the past decade or more I have had blue birds living in a few of my birdhouses outside.  This year, not.   I have only seen one blue bird, that’s it.   The houses are already filled with nut hatchers and I haven’t quite determined the other one, but I know the two do not like each other.  One so much larger than the other and a bully!

Today I’ve been thinking about faith, spirituality, that which we cannot see under microscopes or touch with our hands – Trust, reaching out our hands in the dark.   I have been fortunate (or conscious?) to have had many spiritual awakenings, moments that tell me, unequivocally, there is more than where we are right now.  There is existence following death, it changes drastically, but it’s there.  I take great comfort in this.  I can tell the days where my attitude is in need of tweaking as this is the time I begin to question that which I know.  That’s when I need to reach deep within myself to get past the crap and into the comforting.   I know when the darkness of depression veils it’s ugliness over me as I lose all sense of hope, faith, peace.   Sometimes I believe others think (hell at times I’ve thought) that I should be able to pull myself out of the throws of depression.  If only.   If only.   It’s something I wouldn’t wish on anyone, well maybe one evil bitch, but that’s it!  I didn’t ask to be born into this.   It has swallowed up many days of my life, too many.   Right now I’m free of it, and on the bad days (I’ve had a couple whoppers of late) I am so fearful that it’s returning.  Am I doing everything I can to help myself?  What can I do to help myself?   My therapist ‘reminded’ me today that the excuse I had to cancel my session on Wednesday was not acceptable.  Gulps.   I thanked her for the phone call and the reminder and told her I’d see her Wednesday!   Smiles.  My psychiatrist reminds me that I tend to stop doing the very things that help me, thus my entering into dangerous territory.   True.

Today it’s easy for me to have faith, I’m feeling well physically, mentally, emotionally and everything outside reminds me of mother nature which is dear to me.  Well maybe not skunks.   I drove past one which was road kill this morning and thought I was going to toss my cookies.  Perhaps THIS will be the year none of my animals get sprayed!   Wouldn’t that be nice?

loyal companionI’m missing my Australian shepherd, my Brody.   It’s been a little over a year since he passed.   He loved being outdoors.  Even in his old age (just shy of 13) he could no longer chase the Frisbees or tennis balls, but he would drag them around in his mouth.  Comical, and sweet.   He was awesome, truly awesome.  Sometimes my mom and my friend Robin get to talking about him and we get laughing hysterically.  He was very smart, you’d have to have met him and spent time with him to understand the depth of what I am saying.  He was almost human at times.   He was one of a kind and like all our pets, can never be replaced.   The one steady comfort that helps me to accept his passing was that he had one unbelievable life.  He really did.  He never knew kennels, he was seldom alone and he was a celebrity of sorts in the small town I live in.   I had a studio and gift shop next to the post office which he and my mother would open all week.  He greeted people outside as they were walking into the post office.   His agility, speed and talent of catching tennis balls in mid air (we’re talking using a ball thrower, fast) resulted in cars pulling over to watch him.    The pet store in the next town over said it was because of Brody that he has sold so many ball throwers!   He was known by kids, adults.   One day when I drove by the high school in the next town over he was hanging out the window (his favorite speed was 30-35) and a bunch of kids were waving and screaming his name “Brody!  Brody!”  I had no idea who they were but they surely knew him!

Time to get back to work.  Haven’t decided which task I’m going to tackle next, too many to list!

Rabbit Rabbit


What a glorious day we have been gifted with in New England.   A day in which some will celebrate Easter, the resurrection of Jesus Christ.  Others will gather with family and friends to celebrate the Easter Bunny, jelly beans and good eats.  Then there are those who celebrate that tomorrow all the ridiculously priced marshmallow bunnies, gourmet jelly beans, chocolate hollow or solid bunnies, well, they’ll be half price!!!!!!!!!!   To all, Happy Easter and whatever this day means for you.

I sat outside with the dogs for a half an hour, basking in the warm and welcoming sun.  While the dogs were rolling on their backs down the hill, I sat watching, observing these two silly beautiful creatures.  They look like mutt & Jeff.    A 20 lb terrier mix, and a large, sweet german shepherd whose actions remind me of Scooby Doo.

Music is playing in the background.  A perfect way to start my day before I head over to my brothers for Easter dinner.   Music reaches deep within me, as if to awaken my soul.   Sometimes I close my eyes and let it take me to where it does.  Mesmorizing, hypnotizing, it one of very few things that I can sit quietly without thd ompulsion or desire to product, accomplish.   I’m the type of person that rarely can sit to relax.  The black or white thinking in my brain has me doing doing doing or sleeping like a slug.    I was sharing this last night with guests at a small birthday party for my girlfriend.  I love chickens.  I can sit outside and watch them for hours.   Their response “Really?”  Yes!  Really!   Disney World is a place I can go and detach from all thoughts.   So there you have it… music, chickens & Disney.  Let’s combine those, what would we get?  Hmm   A singing Mickey chick?

As I sat with the small, intimate gathering last night I laughed ridiculously at some memories we were sharing, and some stories of a couples I just met.   I observed the couples, all seemingly happy, connected and thought how nice it was to see.   It has taken years for me to get to a point where I am comfortable being alone.  Loneliness visits frequently but I know what I need to do to keep busy and scurry it away.     When it was just my two girlfriends and me, which together our initials are LSD….I shared that I’m not sure I could compromise now.   A relationship is work, compromises.   I have been single now for 10 years.  I’m fairly set in my ways.  Truth be told I wasn’t that good at compromising in the first place!

Now I shall go get ready to drive over to my brothers.  The German Shepherd will hang out the window and the little one will snuggle up in the corner, her head resting on the arm rest.   It’s comical really.  She loves going for rides, but sits huddled in a corner in the back seat.  They will have a great day and Alas, upon arriving home they will be tired, will sleep which will give me time to do what I want without their demanding attention.

Happy Easter to you and yours…… ♥

The wonderful world of Donna….


Heavy rain, high winds and a german shepherd that wouldn’t do her business but stood out there (with of course moia) with her nose in the air for 15 minutes.  Drenched, I brought her in, would not feed her until she did, so back out in the rain, this time only 10 minutes.    She’s on a leash now because I have neighbors whose pit bull attacked my dogs, 2 feet from my back step and they’ve been ticked off at me ever since I reported them, so they reported her pooping in their yard.    Hell, if I could get away with it, I would!   The winds are so strong I saw Toto flying by in a basket.

Spent yesterday finalizing taxes.  Realized this morning that one of the cats vomited on them so back to the computer and squeaked by on ink for the printer.  Everything happens for a reason, I guess I wasn’t supposed to have enough ink to write a letter to the Board of Health letting them know how filthy my house is at the moment!

Another cat who jumped up on the table I was working at, knocking neatly stacked piles of pattern packets, bills, and more.   One of the bills miraculously fell into the waste basket so I left it.  Everything happens for a reason, right?

A sink full of freshly drawn water, bleach, dish detergent, allowing the 3 days of crust to loosen up for cleaning, and three bottles of prescriptions fell into that.  Fortunately I was right there, pulled them out before much damage was done.

The oldest (geriatric) cat’s loud howl every time I go into the kitchen (which I forget what I went in there for) because she “forgot” that I fed her an hour before.

The little terrier has been the best behaved, laying in “her chair” just watching the circus around her.  God bless her.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to get to the humane society before they close to see if they have 2 more dogs (preferably humungous sized) that I can adopt, now that the German Shepherd (whom I believed was fixed) is out of heat.

Everything happens for a reason, right?  How is your day going?  And now?  a missing purse….

PS  Yesterday I found a tick embedded in the back of my head.  If it were a brain sucker it would have starved.   Dousing that with alcohol and hydrogen peroxide.  I wasn’t even in the woods, I was sitting outdoors for a short bit of time.    fUN!



I KNEW I had butter!


Yesterday, with intentions of making some roni and cheese I couldn’t find the stick of butter I had.   Hmmm, I remember using it yesterday, perhaps I put it in the microwave?  Nope.  My cats love butter and I dislike butter dishes.    I rummaged through the refrigerator…Nope!    What the heck?   I put the roni back and grabbed some soup.

This morning, still perplexed as to where I had put the stick of butter.  I hope I am not eating unconsciously in the middle of the night while on this ambien… but what would I put a quarter pound of butter on?    Seeing’s how I put the bleach in the fridge and the milk in the bathroom a day or two before, I checked once again, this time in cupboards.   Nope.    Oh well, write it off.  It’s only purpose now is to drive me nuts.

I bought the cats “Temptations”.  They love them.   It’s their “midnight snack” when we all go to bed and I keep them in the nightstand beside my bed.   I have been thrilled to find the “MEGA mega packs” because I can save a few bucks.   The dogs get their own midnight treat, as I tuck everyone in, and I will admit at times I have given the dogs a couple temptations also.    The dogs, however, are not lacking for treats.

My living room  began to look like a cow cemetary.   I have been buying marrow bones for the dogs, it keeps them busy, allowing me to focus on working without any interruptions – Well, at least from the dogs.    I have one cat, Chloe, she is beautiful but she isn’t wrapped too tightly.  When I am busy painting, writing, beading, sketching she jumps up on my lap.  It’s fine with some things, others not so much.  So I put her down.  She jumps back up.   We go through this process about 20 times in one sitting.  (Rolling my eyes).  But I digress…   So there are empty marrow bones scattered here and there in the living room.   It’s time to gather up the bones and toss them.  In doing this, the dogs watch me closely.

Sophie has an obnoxious habit of getting into the rubbish.  (Sophie is the 14-15 month old german shepherd I adopted a couple of months ago).   She is fairly adept at doing so, chewing holes in bags only where there is something she wants, which is typically empty cat food cans.   I have tried to discourage and prevent this by putting the garbage up high at night, or on the porch when I leave.

Because I have three geriatric cats and two cat food loving dogs, I have been putting the cat food on a place mat on an island.  They seem to like it and for the most part it keeps their dishes full.  Well, Sophie has learned to pull the place mat towards her, and she eats all the wet and dry food.   She has never dropped a dish on the tile floor, much to my surprise.  So I thought I would outsmart her and took away the place mat.   For a day or two she was good, the cat food was still there in the morning.   Well, she now moves the stools, and gets to it this way.  We are talking a seasoned thief!

A few minutes ago I went upstairs to set up the vaporizer.  My cat, Zoe was laying on the bed, excited to see me as I will slip her a few temptations when the dogs aren’t there.   My nightstand was open, and empty.   What the heck?  I go investigate.   The Mega Mega pack of temptations is nowhere to be found.  $5.   Okay, now it’s time to investigate.   I went shopping with my mom today and didn’t get any because I knew I had that large bag full.    I look under the bed, all around upstairs…Nope.   Hmmm.  I walk downstairs and start searching down there.   Much to my surprise behind the couch I found 4 empty cat food cans, licked dry, the now empty bag of temptations, and guess what else?  The wrapper to the stick of butter!  Mind you, my living room is not set up to get behind the couch.  She HID them there!

As I lift my head to look at her, she lowers her head and runs upstairs.    I can’t help but laugh.   She knows right from wrong, she’s a smart girl.  She is also a thief.    Now I know that I didn’t eat the entire sandwich a few days prior which was on my kitchen counter.  The little shit!

Fortunately for her this comes AFTER an unexpected incident where she saw her past owner.  I was concerned that it would mess her up, or she wouldn’t want to go home with me.  Well, guess what?   She was the first in the jeep!    She knows where her cat food is buttered!    Upon arrival home I let down my guard.  I made the decision that I am keeping her.  I let her deeper into my heart.

Every single woman needs five animals.  Don’t you think?    The Pied Piperette.  I’m the Pied Piperette!   ♥

I’ve got chills… they’re multiplying


Today’s lesson:   Listen to my doctor next year when she suggests a flu shot

Today’s gratitude:  That I now have a stackable upstairs, easy access to the dryer

What started as a cold turned into flu like symptoms.   It’s been joyous…NOT!    I’ve been doing a lot of sleeping, and have been throwing blankets into the dryer, wrapping it around myself to try to get warm.  Obviously feverish, and my body feeling like I’ve ran an 80 mile marathon, I kept track of the animals in between napping.  The sound of the television in the background kept me entertained, though I rarely watched, just listened.   I have shared that I like the Investigate Discovery channel.     A couple nights ago listening to it I heard them advertise “House of Whores”….I’m thinking… well that is both interesting and disgusting.   What has come of this world to have such a television programmed named this and what would Investigate Discovery find in this?    I fall back to sleep.    This morning I was resting and watching the same.   “House of Horrors” was being advertised…. I just sat there shaking my head…. Oh!!!!!

Earlier this week, when I started with the chills, I went to lay on my couch and my oldest cat, female Maine coon cat, peed on a comforter that was on the couch.   I threw the comforter in the wash and took the cushion covers off the couch to wash “just in case”.   Lord knows I couldn’t smell anything.   Well, I decided to also clean the pillow covers to the down pillows that reside on the sofa for comfort.  When I took off the cover little down feathers flew everywhere.  Everywhere!   I said “screw it”, shoved the pillows in a garbage bag, not to throw away but to hopefully stop the release of feathers that my cats were having a field day with, until Sophie started bothering them.   As Sophie chased them, the feathers spread all around the room.   I was too tired to go and get the vacuum, all I wanted to do was lay on the couch which wasn’t happening.  With laundry in I went back to bed.  Upon returning downstairs a few hours later my living room now not only had feathers but bunches of batting from the cushions that Sophie chewed off, trying to fill her boredom.   I couldn’t believe it.   There she laid in the middle of the room on a sofa cushion which was standing on its side when I went to bed.    Fortunately she didn’t like how it tasted because she stopped on that one cushion.  Grateful the integrity of the cushions were not harmed, I fed them, went back to bed trying to convince myself that tomorrow would be better.  Such chaos.     While I have picked up most of the batting which looked like clumps of snow on my rug, the feathers still remain.  What a mess.   The cushion covers are still thrown over the shower curtain, a blanket is thrown over the couch, the pillows are still in the plastic bag.   When I exert myself my fever comes back.   Joy!

The bathroom cupboard clean out is still in process, and there is a dishpan of dishes that I keep going by thinking “I need to do these”.   I am continually cleaning my favorite mug, going back and forth between soup and chai tea.  Where the heck did the other dishes come from?

Tumbleweeds of dog hair in the corners of my house on the tile and hardwood floors remind me of why I used to call my Australian shepherd… Australian shedder.   This german shepherd is no different.   I pick up some here and there, again thinking “I need to vacuum”…  Yah, yah, I need, I need, I need.  I need to feel better!

“You’re sick an awful lot Donna”.  A person once asked me if I ever eat vegetables…  I just shake my head.  Yes, and yes.   No I did not have a flu shot, to my detriment.   Perhaps next year I’ll LISTEN to my doctor.   If anyone knows about my compromised immune system it is me!    It felt so good to be back outside hiking for a few minutes with the dogs, that has ceased with the house keeping.   Soon, I tell myself, soon I will be back in good health.  As annoying and inconvenient as these bouts of illness are, I still have it made compared to many.    I can live with this, bitch about it, but it isn’t going to kill me.   This is temporary, hopefully being bitchy is, too!

I have found that if I stay downstairs, crank the thermostat and have the gas fireplace going, the dogs fall fast asleep.   Ahhhh, peace!

When feeling up to it I designed jewelry, which was comical as the next day I would look at whatever it was I made and found humor in the comedy of errors….unmatched earrings, a necklace with one side 3″ longer than the other….  Good god, it’s funny.   Soon I will deliver the jewelry I have been working on to my sister-in-law and friend who is so kindly putting it online for me.    As of today beading is now on the back burner.  I picked up the paintbrush [two deadlines]  only to find more humor in my attempts at this medium……. I yi yi!

Now I shall go warm up some soup and sit in the chaos of my living room and watch ID channel, and advertisements for House of HORRORS!

“Summer at the Lake”


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The bathroom cupboard abyss


Today’s Lesson:   Empty out my bathroom cupboards before buying ANYTHING else

Today’s Gratitude:   Peace, calm, a few moments of solitude and bliss.  Thank you marrow bones!

There is no way around it, I am going to have to bring Sophie to the vet this week.  Was hoping to save some money that I don’t have!  Anyway, her skin is so chaffed and sore where she keeps itching it.  Last night I thought I was going to pass out when she came in from the other room and had blood in the center of her head.   I took a cold compress and held it there, she let me, then focused on my own breathing!    Her ears are so dry it hurts me to look at them.   So why am I sharing all of this?  I digress.   I went looking for the cortisone crème in my bathroom tower.    I’ve been in there for a half an hour throwing things out.  My goodness, it has everything in there with the exception of the Trojan Twister which I’ve been getting daily emails advertising such.   Where did they get my email address?

I found a pair of silpada earrings that I’ve been in search for for several months.   I thought of John Denver’s “This old guitar” song about finding his first guitar given to him from his grandmother, a sentimental song as I pulled out from the abyss my oldest and favorite hair brush.   In fact, I held it up like a microphone and sang “This old hair brush taught me to unsnarl my hair….”   How sentimental, ahhh happiness.  Then I pulled out two relatively new hair brushes that I had bought to replace the old one I couldn’t find.   These hurt my head so I won’t be keeping these and they are in too good of shape (like new) to toss.  Maybe one of my friends has a thick enough scalp that they won’t mind the pointed painful spikes that  not only brush your hair smooth, but leave a rake mark across your head!  There were 8 tubes of Vaseline intensive care lotion, 2 St Ives scrub, 2 hair picks, a small tube of something that was suggested to put lightly in her ears… S C O R E !, some anti itch crème which I put on her.  She just stands there and lets me do it.  Her eyes tell a million stories and she is no doubt, thrilled that I am trying to help her.  At least 50 various sized emery boards, 8 nail polishes, a multitude of triple antibiotic ointment, gauze pads, swabs, and more from home health care after a couple complications from surgeries for breast cancer.   5 mascaras (some so old they wouldn’t open), Mary Kay eye shadow that is at least 15 years old, Sun tan lotion that has my nephews name on it, that has got to be 15 years old as well.   Sample shampoos, moisturizers and soap from the many hotels I’ve stayed at over the years (my mother collects them, but apparently I forgot to give her a zillion of them)     In short I found everything but the kitchen sink and the cortisone crème and Benadryl!  I have two Walmart bags full of trash, and I took a break to enjoy the quiet that has happened upon my house.

Since putting the anti itch crème on her Sophie is running around like a wild woman!   There is something in the crème to soothe and apparently it is giving her relief, thank God.   Tomorrow I’ll decide what vet to call and get her in this week.   I’m sure I will come home with several medications and I’m sure they will do a skin scale to determine if there is more going on than allergies.   I am not sure if this dog is for me.   Brody was relatively maintenance free, well with the exception of 5 Kenmore vacuum cleaner bags a month.  Now I have a vacuum that you empty out, it doesn’t use bags….   A very good thing given the expense of the bags!

I think I’ll go and do some work before I venture back into the unexpected bathroom project.   Rubbish day is only 4 days away, I still have time!  It’s relatively quiet at the moment, having given the dogs each authentic smelly marrow bones.   Extraordinarily peaceful right now!   Going to go take advantage of it.

It’s 3:00pm, do you know what’s in your bathroom cupboards??????

Today’s Artwork:  “Cheryl’s Kitchen” cherylsfront