Tag Archives: australian shepherd

Faith, Love, Brody

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I’m often asked “How do you choose what you write about?”  Well, that’s easy…whatever is on my mind!   Typically something will happen that will trigger thoughts during that day, other times I share on what ails me, pleases me.

One safe topic is the weather and we are having BEAUTIFUL weather here in Vermont.  Low 70’s, blue skies, a nice breeze that feels like silk on my skin.  The dogs are delighting in it as well, hanging out the windows of my jeep, running around like banches having fun.  The signs of winter have passed and far from my mind, well except saying that!   Trees and bushes are budding, flowers are breaking soil and just for this day I am grateful to be living in Vermont.

For the past decade or more I have had blue birds living in a few of my birdhouses outside.  This year, not.   I have only seen one blue bird, that’s it.   The houses are already filled with nut hatchers and I haven’t quite determined the other one, but I know the two do not like each other.  One so much larger than the other and a bully!

Today I’ve been thinking about faith, spirituality, that which we cannot see under microscopes or touch with our hands – Trust, reaching out our hands in the dark.   I have been fortunate (or conscious?) to have had many spiritual awakenings, moments that tell me, unequivocally, there is more than where we are right now.  There is existence following death, it changes drastically, but it’s there.  I take great comfort in this.  I can tell the days where my attitude is in need of tweaking as this is the time I begin to question that which I know.  That’s when I need to reach deep within myself to get past the crap and into the comforting.   I know when the darkness of depression veils it’s ugliness over me as I lose all sense of hope, faith, peace.   Sometimes I believe others think (hell at times I’ve thought) that I should be able to pull myself out of the throws of depression.  If only.   If only.   It’s something I wouldn’t wish on anyone, well maybe one evil bitch, but that’s it!  I didn’t ask to be born into this.   It has swallowed up many days of my life, too many.   Right now I’m free of it, and on the bad days (I’ve had a couple whoppers of late) I am so fearful that it’s returning.  Am I doing everything I can to help myself?  What can I do to help myself?   My therapist ‘reminded’ me today that the excuse I had to cancel my session on Wednesday was not acceptable.  Gulps.   I thanked her for the phone call and the reminder and told her I’d see her Wednesday!   Smiles.  My psychiatrist reminds me that I tend to stop doing the very things that help me, thus my entering into dangerous territory.   True.

Today it’s easy for me to have faith, I’m feeling well physically, mentally, emotionally and everything outside reminds me of mother nature which is dear to me.  Well maybe not skunks.   I drove past one which was road kill this morning and thought I was going to toss my cookies.  Perhaps THIS will be the year none of my animals get sprayed!   Wouldn’t that be nice?

loyal companionI’m missing my Australian shepherd, my Brody.   It’s been a little over a year since he passed.   He loved being outdoors.  Even in his old age (just shy of 13) he could no longer chase the Frisbees or tennis balls, but he would drag them around in his mouth.  Comical, and sweet.   He was awesome, truly awesome.  Sometimes my mom and my friend Robin get to talking about him and we get laughing hysterically.  He was very smart, you’d have to have met him and spent time with him to understand the depth of what I am saying.  He was almost human at times.   He was one of a kind and like all our pets, can never be replaced.   The one steady comfort that helps me to accept his passing was that he had one unbelievable life.  He really did.  He never knew kennels, he was seldom alone and he was a celebrity of sorts in the small town I live in.   I had a studio and gift shop next to the post office which he and my mother would open all week.  He greeted people outside as they were walking into the post office.   His agility, speed and talent of catching tennis balls in mid air (we’re talking using a ball thrower, fast) resulted in cars pulling over to watch him.    The pet store in the next town over said it was because of Brody that he has sold so many ball throwers!   He was known by kids, adults.   One day when I drove by the high school in the next town over he was hanging out the window (his favorite speed was 30-35) and a bunch of kids were waving and screaming his name “Brody!  Brody!”  I had no idea who they were but they surely knew him!

Time to get back to work.  Haven’t decided which task I’m going to tackle next, too many to list!

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Sandbagged…. by a dog!

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True to our routine this morning Brody (my aussie) and I were outside playing frisbee.  We’ve been reduced to his old orange frisbee that a friend’s dog chewed, so it doesn’t fly well, nor does it go far.   A couple of months ago his favorite ultra light frisbee that Uncle Doug bought him last year came up missing.  This sucker not only “flies through the air with the greatest of ease” but goes quite a long distance.  After several scouting trips, with Brody’s help, I decided it was probably stolen.  We have a Black Lab in the neighborhood who runs loose at night and has stolen one of Brody’s new frisbee’s before.  I texted my brother just yesterday to find out where he had bought that frisbee so that I could replace it for my boy for Christmas.

This morning’s heavy winds assisted me to successfully throw this clunky old frisbee far enough that he could actually run and jump up and the air to grab it, something that he loves to do.   Now that he’s a senior citizen, and because it is so rare that I can get this thing to fly well enough for him to do this, I make very big of his success.  Mom is his personal cheerleader!

Off we head to the poop patch (Yes, I’m talking about the poop patch on my blog!).  As he is doing his duty I always look around for tennis balls that have been left behind, particularly now before snowfall.  Out of the corner of my eye much further out in the woods than we typically go I spotted this lime green color.  The same color of the rim of his ultra light fris.  Rather hopeful as I walk towards it, the wind wind clearly moved the leaves around enough to expose his long lost trophy fris!  Now, mind you, when Brody “finds” a long lost prized possession he carries it around prancing, showing it off for hours.  I could not wait to show him what the wind storm had unearthed for him!  As I was walking over to it I called him over, he quickly obliged.  I expected a dramatic reunion between him and his “old friend”.  To my surprise he slouched over and walked towards it slowly, in the same manner as he does when he is caught stealing cat food or hiding tennis balls in the middle of playing.  He hides tennis balls a lot from my mother, mostly because she usually does not go trudging up into the woods looking for them, I do!  She will throw the ball for him, and he comes back with nothing.  You have to understand that this dog is very intelligent, he “speaks” to you with unspoken language.   If he wants me to put the computer down he will sit beside me waiting for eye contact.  When I make it with him he will look at me, then look at my computer, several times.  He knows how to communicate to you what he wants.  My brother has always been impressed with how he uses his front paws to catch the frisbee, or as we would our hands.  I digress….  Back to the woods.  He suspiciously lowers his head, looking up at me out of the corner of his eye…What is this about?  He didn’t even pick it up!

I picked up the frisbee and walked back into the field where he is waiting for me to toss his fris.  I threw the ultra light…it went far, he ran hard for it, caught it, dropped it, then ran back to me.  This is not how we play!  He is now waiting for me to toss the old clunky orange frisbee, I oblige.  It flies for about 2 seconds then rolls on the ground for 20 feet, he runs after it, scoops it up and then brings it back to me.  This scenerio repeated itself a couple of times before I realized, the little shit HID the ultra light just as he hides tennis balls on my mom when he is tired.  He was doing his guilty slouch and walk because he KNEW the frisbee was there!  If you could see his little play act when I am playing with him and he hides a tennis ball on me.   I know when I am getting closer to the ball because his little nub (he has no tail, they dock it at birth) is going 100 miles an hour, and he’s circling the area while looking out of the corner of his eyes at me!  He’s quite the dog, my Brody boy.   I was sandbagged by my dog!

He will be 11 in June, is a couple pounds overweight.  To look at him you would think he is in perfect health.  He has arthritis, and is having some health issues that clearly concern me, however, this is all part of his age.  He has always been a very proud dog, sensitive too.  He would never lay down and rest, even in the smouldering heat of the summer, we would have to stop throwing the ball for him and make him drink water, particularly if kids were over playing with him.  He wanted to keep playing.  Hiding this fast, far flying frisbee is his way of slowing down!

As we walked down the bank to the house, Brody with the old clunky orange frisbee hanging out of the side of his mouth, hanging by his eye tooth, and me carrying the ultra light, I had many thoughts.   For one, I felt guilty for blaming the big black lab that flies through hear by night, second, I am grateful I didn’t spend $25 on a new ultra light for him, and third, I think my dog in his old age is smarter than his momma!

Cats, Dogs & Cold Feet

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Monday, April 5th, 2010

My morning started at 6am when I let my dog out… When Miss Chloe, one of my indoor cats who isn’t all there (she uses her whole head to watch a fly,,, its hilarious) ran outside.    Barefoot, with nothing on but a silk black robe (which I discovered was inside out) I chased her around the house, the yard, and the neighbors.   After 5 minutes she ran towards the porch to run inside and my aussie was sitting there blocking her entrance…. shaking my head.  So round and round the house we went again.  Finally 15 minutes later, frozen muddy feet,

we both returned back inside the house.

Update:  At 9:45 tonight both of the little darlings got out…  Fortunately I found a flashlight that worked, and got them both inside within 15 min….