Tired of roosters!

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In case I haven’t mentioned it, I have  been painting roosters for the past couple of weeks.  My favorite one is one that I did really fast, without obsessing or focusing on perfection.  I would LIKE to make that my style.  Ya know?   Obsessing takes the fun out of art, and it should be fun.

So I’ve painted I think 13 roosters, and it’s time to take a break.  Head shots, altering views.  I have an artist friend who I haven’t seen a lot of his work but what I have seen, he paints odd angles of animals, objects and it rocks.  So I’m trying to get outside my comfort zone.   BUT I need something in front of me besides a rooster.
rooster13
rooster1

I am a firm believer in “repetition lends clarity” so all these should make me a master, but not! 🙂   What do you like to paint?

So I’m going to post a few, and then sit down and work on a landscape or something.    Maybe finish one of the many unfinished.   Looking to take some classes, versus teaching them.  I’m not a fine artist by any stretch of the imagination, but I do pay a lot of attention to detail.

We’re having Spring like weather here in New England.  It’s been nice.  I still haven’t looked in my cellar to see how much water is down there.  How’s that for denial?

Happy Thoughts for you, have a good night!

Things I’ve learned

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Have been painting, and listening to music.  “I’m holding on, I’m holding on, I’m holding on, I’m barely holding onto you”.   Lifehouse “Broken”.

Thinking about times of my life where I was broken, so much that it hurt to move.   And it is the pain from those times that keep me vigilant to never go there again.  But is that any way to live?   “Is there healing?  In your name, I feel healing”…

Mother Teresa “I have found a paradox in love, if you love until it hurts, then there is no more hurt, only more love”.   One of my favorite quotes.

Here’s a few things I’ve learned in this journey called life.

True Friends show up when you need them the most, and you don’t need to talk to them every day, you don’t need to hear from them to know, they are there, nothing has or will ever change.  It is also at the most needful times that we learn, sadly, who we can count on, and who is fair weathered.

I’ve also learned that love comes when you least expect it.  For if and when you search, that which you find is forced.  Nothing is more refreshing than falling in love when you aren’t looking, or thus doing anything to get the attention of another.  You’re just being yourself, and in my case, and I hope yours, seeking to be a better person for each day we are alive.

Two halves never make a whole.  But two wholes can be together and still, independent of each other.  I think this is the healthiest place to be, to fall in love.

I’ve also learned that falling in love isn’t just about human relationships, but about life, and things we stumble upon that thrust our passion into full speed.  Passion is an awesome thing, and one that I am very very grateful for.   I have met people, quite long in the tooth, that have never experienced passion.    The past couple weeks I’ve fallen in love again with painting, with new techniques, new visions.   I’ve fallen back in love with my very old, needy, ditzy cat, who is quite vocal about her needs and wishes!

Being alone done not mean loneliness.   At least not for me.   I have been single over a decade now.  I’ve dated, and really have no preference if I do or I don’t.  You can say that’s sad, some friends have, but honestly, I love my home, I work on that, I have my art, music, my animals, and family and friends that I do not spend enough time with.   When I feel like I don’t want to be alone, I call up a friend who is kindred here.  We both like our solitude.

“Desire” by Ryan Adams is now playing. I found this song off an old “House Episode”, love it.   I’ve also learned in life that there are more ways than being in a relationship to get that physical human touch.  My animals, and in past, my nephews, my niece.   A new born baby, animal, I think that’s why the world is watching and anticipating the birth of April the giraffes bambino!     Who isn’t watching?

So, in this day, reflective of my past, my past loves, I am sitting here in peace, with happiness in my heart as I play and work in this newfound love for art.  Each brush stroke I anticipate, and it’s hitting right where it’s supposed to.  Even accidentally dropped a brush on my painting and the color looked delightful in a place I never would’ve expected or tried.

“You know me.
You don’t mind waiting.
You just can’t show me, but God I’m praying,
That you’ll find me, and that you’ll see me,
That you run and never tire.
Desire
Desire
Desire
Desire”

Wishing you love, passion, and always, peace
rodney2

Saturday night

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It’s Saturday night.  I’ve been painting since 2 today.   Was so enthralled I forgot to eat.  Believe me, that doesn’t happen a lot!  Anyway, the brush is still flowing, and I’m looking at the clock knowing, I need to keep to a schedule.   This is one of those nights I could paint until 2-4am.  I know it.

Grateful that I have the abilities that I do.  They keep me entertained.  I have three major (once hobbies) that I do, and while I love each and every one of them, I know my life would be easier if I just chose one, and stuck to it.  But that’s not me.  Of course it isn’t!   🙂

I heard the weather in New England today called “Balmy”, twice.  You don’t hear that too often either.  It was in the 60’s.  February, 60’s.   I didn’t touch foot outside all day.   Nor have I gone to look in my cellar at how much flooding is happening.   I’m in a good mood, want to keep it!

Listening to music, and thinking about the times in my life that these songs were new, and what was happening then.   Oh how I love music.  I am confident I would be a miserable being if I didn’t have it in my life.  It’s my muse.

Happy Saturday night!  Hope you’re doing well, and if not… hold strong.  I speak from experience, it’s always darkest before the dawn.

 

 

Gut instinct

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Something short tonight.    I was reminded of how accurate our intuition is.   Make your intuition stronger than your doubt of it.  We all have been gifted with free will, intuition, denial…  The five stages of grieving identified by a female german doctor who was called “Dr. Death” by the many male doctors that she worked with, Dr. Kubler-Ross.

But I digress.

What I want to say is, don’t stay “stuck” on one thing.  Don’t deny what you are seeing and hearing with your own eyes and ears.   Learn to trust your judgement, learn to trust your gut instinct.  Many of us have been groomed differently, and many of us just brush off things because it may sound absurd, or ridiculous.   Your intuition will guide you, it will protect you and others.  We all have it, innately.   For whatever reason you are repressing it, ask yourself WHY.  What is it I’m afraid it’s going to tell me?

It’s healthy to question others words, motives.   I’m not talking about extremes.  I ‘m not suggesting you walk around like, cynical of all.  But what I am telling you is…  I believe the wisest man listens to his instincts.

Put that in your hat and smoke it!

 

Creative zoning

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It’s the wee hours of morning.  Many of my friends are just rising.  This is my favorite time of day.  I guess because it’s very quiet, I’m seldom if ever interrupted by the phone, and my creativity screams from 10pm-4am.   So many have expressed their concerns, that I’m isolating, which may be true, but truly, this is a peaceful time for me.

The cat is asleep, I hear her little snore in between the lulls of music.  My studio is in the usual disarray that happens with winds of creativity.  I’ve got two stacks of messy bun hats that are holding up the rooster and turtle paintings, and my large painting table is covered, every inch.  It’s awesome.  When I go into the kitchen to fill my glass with drink, I look at the pile of dishes and smile.   It will end.  Eventually this streak will come to close, or slow anyway, and the dishes will eventually get done!

So many of my friends are struggling, or have been with health issues.   I offer prayers for them whenever I think of them, or see their posts.  I slept and rested today, watching some old television programs on Netflix.  But at 10pm, my mind was thinking of color, texture, and ways to paint certain pieces, effects.

Earlier today when I fell asleep on the couch, I had a dream that recurs.  It’s a painful dream, and I always wake up feeling breathless, and sad.  So I did what I have learned to do, and that is, not run from it, but honor it, and not dissect every bit of it, but lightly think about why now?  Sometimes the answer comes, sometimes it doesn’t.  I’m grateful this dream is not nearly as frequent as it used to be.  And I’ve come to accept I’ll probably have it for life, unless somehow I find resolution.  But there is no resolution.  The best way I knew how to shake it off was with a brush in hand.

I must admit when I rose today I wasn’t thrilled to see it snowing.  As I walk in my yard it’s hard to believe that I will ever see ground again, but I will.   And in Spring when new life grows, and I see the beginning of plants and perennials that survived the winter, I forget all about the tons of white shit that right now fill my yard and block off about 1/3 of my normal driveway.

So, this is where my thoughts are.   On painting, on new beginnings, and sadly, some endings.   It is what it is.

I’m seriously considering taking some classes, art related, maybe even a writing class to get me seriously actively pursuing a lifelong dream.

Plans to stay up all day today, and try to curve myself back into the schedule of the majority of the world.   We shall see how that goes.

Peace to you,

 

Alas, direction

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Tonight I am flying high.  No, not on sugar, though I do have it running in my veins, but because what seemed to be a very long, much anticipated and grueling time that I have been “in waiting” for direction has finally arrived.     And comically, or rather ironically, I really don’t know the logistics or to what is going to unveil itself to me, but I can tell you, when the spirit hit, a couple weeks ago, I forced myself to walk in faith.  To just keep doing what I believe I was “supposed” to do.

Like negative space in a drawing, painting, or room, waiting for direction is anything but comfortable (unless you are privy in past to “wait for it”).  But I’ve lived long enough to know in order to have peace we have to find comfort in the uncomfortable, and those things that come after the longest time, and that time feeling like purgatory (No, I’m not catholic, but my mother was raised in this religion, I also pay attention to those people that are the happiest, the most peaceful, serene, and I listen to what is beautiful in their life), so when a break comes, a ray of light, or hope really, it is so incredibly wonderful.

In youth I was quick to jump, to “find” whatever it was I thought I was supposed to experience.  Maturity has taught me, nothing worth having comes easy.  Nothing.  And if it looks too good to be true?  It probably is!

So tonight I have five paintings started.  A still life, floral (2), a rooster, and  for the life of me I can’t remember what the fifth one is.  All started this evening when I got home from a day that felt purposeful, important, helping others, others who weren’t practicing the kind of drama that belongs on a stage (or in a helium balloon that floats fastly and quickly away), but real life, illnesses, frustration, and just needing a fresh advocate come in and help.  It feels so good to me to help others.   My last therapist wrongfully suggested the reason why I help others is because I get “kudos”.  I looked straight at her, without hesitation and said “If you believe this to be true?  You have never given to another from the goodness or your heart, and RECEIVED the loving touch of God blessing you.  I feel it.  I don’t seek for permission, admiration, or for others to pump up a broken soul.  I am not broken, I am not in need of friends, and I am certainly not in need to be validated as worthy.  I learned from the age of 10 or so that to give is to receive.   It’s one of my most cherished gifts in life.  And to fully understand this, give without the other person, or recipients KNOW you are doing it, and tell nobody, not.a.soul!

Of course, as with anything, there are extremes, and there are takers out there that will rob your heart from the generosity that we’re meant to feel, to do, to be.   That’s where lives lessons kind of kick you in the teeth.   Oh how I know this place, and I have no desire to return there, but I will.   That old familiar feeling of caring or giving too much to another will shadow a day, or two, but I’ll jump back in and try it all over again.  Just not necessarily with the same person, but sometimes, YES, the same person.

So, I really need to get to bed, but I don’t want to put the brush down.  It’s flowing, and creativity is at my optimum.  It’s a wonderful, wonderful, place to be.  So grateful I struggled so long in purgatory!   Because even if I wake up tomorrow and the creativity has fizzled, tonight?  What I’m feeling tonight?  Was worth the wait.  Keep in mind, I don’t know what’s ahead of me, I don’t know ANY details, I was just given a direction.   It’s exciting that something I once thought was so insignificant can and does bring me so much joy!

 

May peace be with you, and may you bask in the glory of “knowing” which road or path to take.  Love to you!

With every goodbye, we learn

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Saturday night.  I’m painting, with music in the background.  Finally got to town to get a few groceries, as we’re going to get another 12-18″ snow tomorrow.  The scraping of the windshield is old.

Have been reflecting today on many things.  For one, how the gift of age brings you knowledge.  Important knowledge.  Unfortunately our bodies wear out as we become brilliant!  But seriously, I’ve been through enough in my life to know, it may be dark now, but it won’t last forever.  One day I will feel better, and before you know it, that which caused me angst or grief becomes background flack.  Nothing you really miss over time, but you always remember the lessons.   Pain is a great motivator for change.   Pain is much of the reason why people change themselves, their lives.

I’ve also been thinking how grateful I am that I have good, sound, (well, somedays!) intelligent parents.   I’m grateful for the upbringing I had, and while I’ve skated in dangerous territory, I have the strength of my parents morals and standards, to hold strong too, as they are now, mine.

But youth, and I’m talking in your teens or twenty’s, depending on what you’ve been through, you don’t necessarily know at that age that things will fade, things will improve.  That doesn’t mean you stay laying in “wait” of it.  Because I think we were granted “free will”, and that gift can destroy us, if we let it.    But the strength of experience, that can sustain you for much.  It’s so unfortunate that at the toughest parts of your life you learn who is and isn’t your friend, who is loyal, who is worthy of being sent out to sea, but this, too, strengthens us.  We come wise.   The trick is not to become bitter.

I also see how things were prepared for me, to “get strong”.  What I mean by that, a divorce that I didn’t want but that a couple decades later I AM SO GRATEFUL it happened.  My life has been so much better than it was then.  But I was afraid, and I was young.   And while I didn’t know if I would get through it, I did, and I met someone else, and I worked on myself, and worked through the crap of it all.  I became a better person for it.  A person who at that time learned, I CAN accept, I CAN get beyond, I CAN grow, and learn, and start anew.  Then, when cancer starting ravaging my family, and the loss of my kid sister, that was so much larger than any divorce for me.  But I saw how going through the divorce years before had strengthened me.  So when my sister took ill, I could be there for her, and I was.     And then months later, her passing, the strength and wisdom I gained from that helped me, once again, start over, and say goodbye to someone I needed to say goodbye too.  And it took every bit of me to do that.

This is not to downplay loss.  Not at all.   In the end I had to accept the loss of this person, not just to booze but to death.  So, I can look back and see the times that brought the most growth for me.    And I’m a pretty strong chick!  Gotta tell ya!   But even in this, there are days I could easily fold into the arms of a trusted, and surrender myself in tears.

I’m thinking all of this because of a place where someone I care about is.   Man, he’s getting thrown a lot of lessons, and pain.   But I believe he will make it.   Once he starts building HIS life again.  I will be praying for him, and asking my faithful prayer friends to do the same.  He is a survivor of sorts already, freed from people that the average person would not even know exist, and trust me, I hope you never do.   But there are some pretty sick, ignorant people whose very ignorance is a bit scary to someone who follows rules and works for a living, and for everything they have.

So, that’s it for tonight.  I need to get back and finish the fifth rooster I’ve painted this week.   It’s been enjoyable, and I’ve regained some confidence with the brush.  Just have to do it, and say no to the negative.

Happy night!  Hope yours is, too.

This, too, shall pass…

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Someone I love deeply is under fire.    Undeserving, but not unexpected fire.    As I read the comments, I thought about who this person is.   What a good person he is.

When you were little, you were so kind to others.  You’re intelligence showed at the age of 3 when you and I were driving to Town at dark, and you were humming “Twilight Zone” as you looked at the sky, and smiled.

Well, the time you stole the money from your friends and brother, that was more out of madness, and I’m sure we can all look back on that and laugh.  It was corrected.  You were feeling pushed and didn’t like it.  I want you to remember that time.  How old were you?   There is a huge difference between then, and who you are, with what you are currently facing.  For one, you know right and wrong.  You may not like them, but you are a law abiding citizen surrounded with those that know nothing of the person you are, or who you will be by the end of this.

The stabbing lies, the vindictiveness, I’m shaking my head as I’m thinking about it.  Dear soul, you have been swimming with the likes of vultures, with that heart of gold of yours.  You are by far one of the nicest, kindest people I’ve ever know.  I am so proud of you, every day.   I was so disappointed with what you settled for, but I’ve been there, too.  And I’m sure, no, I have no doubt, that the spitting and vicious attacks will continue.  Why?  My dear child, it isn’t about you.  It isn’t about you at all.  It is about them.  You just were “throwing pearls to swine”.   They didn’t value you, they raped your kindheartedness, stole not only every cent you ever made, were given, but celebrated their own victories on your earnings.

I am so relieved to hear that you are making changes.  I am proud of you, again.  I’ve no doubt this decision was the hardest one you’ve ever made in your life.  I know why you stayed, and one day they will, too.   And hopefully they will not fall (more than they already have) to the likes of these, I hesitate to even call them “people”.  Perhaps one day, they too will be relinquished from the evils, the spite, the lowest form of beings I have ever known.  And I’ve known a few.

So, when they go low, you go high.  There were many things I didn’t like about the Obama Presidency but I will say, this?  This has stayed with me, and I’ve packed it away to pull out for the very times that you are walking through right now.   You will get beyond this, because of who you are, and all of us who love you, and will help you find your way out.

Never ever ever ever give up.   Even when you feel like it, and I’m here to tell you, my dear child, that you will want to.  There will be days the snakes have surrounded you, and the evil will be so strong that you’ll want to not fight, but you will.  You will because of the very two reasons why you stayed.  You will never give up on them.

I love you more than I can say, and I am sorry you are in pain, and in this place, but I am so proud that you are here, that you are finally here, and even if for this one evening you feel your own worth, I promise you, you only recognize 1/200ths of your worth.  You’ve been told and mistreated so, you haven’t even a clue as to who you are, or what you are capable of.  But you will.  I promise you.  You will.

The past is the past, and it will sting for some time, mostly from the likes of those who only know how to piss, moan, bitch, and steal.   Leaches, really.    How many times have you EVER treated anyone like they have you????    And my wish for you is, you will never know this, and I don’t believe you ever will, because of who you are.

So you rest, and you do your best every day, in every way.  When they start pissing on you, you ignore, and remember the two reasons why you will always be the better person, with morals, standards.   You are a good person, and some part of you knows that.  Some part of you recognizes that you didn’t deserve this treatment, nor to be in the likes of these snakes.  Because you have walked in courage the last few days.   You will never, ever regret walking in courage.

And when you have your doubts (and you will), you remember those who love you, and you lean to them to remind you of our worth, your strength, and what a beautiful, amazing person you are.   Some of the best times of my life were with you.    I love you.  You’ve got this, and when you feel you don’t?  We’ve got your back.

 

There’s another storm a

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Dragged my butt out of bed this morning because my cat was persistent.  I was dizzy, my head felt separate from my body, and I wasn’t sure how I was going to even get down the stairs.

An unproductive day bothers me.  I feel the need to accomplish.   But carrying around severe clinical depression in a knapsack on my back, some days I have to give myself a break.  Sometimes getting out of bed is the one and only accomplishment I’ll get done.   I have friends, friends who understand the talons of this disease, and encourage me to do the basics.

So when I was able to make it to town to get milk and a few groceries (We are in between storms here in Vermont, and I should’ve shopped LAST week!), I was thrilled with myself.  Managed to get the garbage out, and then took a three hour nap.  Cold medicine helped me lift my head from my favorite couch pillow, and I felt well enough to paint.   Happy!

The market where I went to get milk, bread, basics, there was a woman my age who was working.  She was friendly, pretty.   We spoke briefly on the impending storm, and she mentioned she had to shovel her drive and walkways.   I comically shared with her that Winter, three-four years ago I had a plow bill of about $450, and I figured I’d have to sleep with my plower to get the bill paid off.   She did a huge belly roll, surprised that I said that.  “I have no one to plow, my husband died in July”.   “I’m sorry, I said”.

Normally here, I would offer a brief  pause in my day to listen, if she wanted to share.  I wasn’t feeling well enough to stand there much longer, so I wished her a good day and drove my ass home.     All the way home I was thinking about her.  Man, she’s still green with her loss, that is a hard hard trek.   But she was working, was very friendly, KIND, and I said a prayer for her.   So many friends are experiencing loss right now, or serious serious illnesses, life threatening.   It’s hard here in New England in Winter.  I can go all winter without seeing my next door neighbors.  It’s just the way Winter is.

As I was painting tonight, (working on farm animals, not my forte, but I want to get good at painting them!), I thought again about her friendliness, her kindness, and somehow, some way, I will do something kind for her without her knowing it.   She so deserves that.  Facing such pain and changes in life, for her to be MORE than civil, is, in my book, awesome.

Now I’m going to go finish this Rooster, and then head to bed.   I’m finding that I don’t want to go to bed.  I love my bed, I truly do, and my bedroom is pretty.  But I’m finding it harder and harder to get up.   Need to boost up my D3 intake, and get outside, in fresh air, no matter the weather.   But today?  Today I think I did very good, given how crappy I was feeling.

Kindness is so contagious, and in her circumstances I dare say “courageous”.

 

My first children’s book

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This is a long blog, it’s a compilation of the many blogs that survived a transfer from one website to another, and is the story of how this little beautiful black stray came into my life.  Many of my friends on fb followed this.  Anyway, I’ve decided, today, to make this my first children’s book in which I would like to illustrate, too.  I’ll take excerpts from these, make necessary changes, additions, and fill in for the lost blogs.  In short, this is the basis of my first children’s book.  What do you think?

April 27th, 2011   Little Black Stray

So a couple of days ago several people knocked on my door to ask if that little curly black dog trying to (dangerously) get across the road was mine, or did I know who it belonged too?    And so starts my obsession with this sweet little stray dog that is hiding out next door, in the back of the buildings where there is junked cars, half cars, pieces of cars, several old buildings, knooks, and crannies…

I walk over in the morning and leave him/her food and water.   I walk back over a few hours later to see if its gone.  I leave Iams bones.  I go back over at dinner time to leave food and water.  I will both drive and walk over at least 4 or 5 times a day to see if he/she will come out.

Everyday I have spotted him/her but it runs away and hides and hides well.  It will not let me even close.  I hate to think that this dog is out at night, last night in horrific thunder storms that rattled the roof off my house, I can only imagine how it magnified over there in metal land!

At night, before I head to bed, I leave some food out at my house too, in case he/she wanders over.  Every morning the food is gone.  I want to believe that this little stray is coming over for a midnight snack, though I’m skeptical that I’m feeding skunks or racoons.

If I do not gain any trust or rapport with this little guy in the next couple of days I will call the Humane Society and see about getting a Save a Heart trap/cage.  Perhaps I should do this sooner, I don’t know.  I do know that this is how I won over Jenny, my Maine Coon cat who is the Queen Pin of my feline fetale.  I do not need another dog nor want one, but maybe someone is missing this little guy.  I would rather believe that than believe that someone dumped it off.    I’ve advertised in several areas, all to no success.  Will keep trying.

The owner of the property where the stray is hiding picks on me.  “Are you going to feed your little puppy again?”  as I was walking over this evening.  “Yes, I said, so hush up!”.  He asks like a big toughie, but really, when I asked if he minded if I fed the dog, he said No, go ahead, though I hope you aren’t bringing me a family of skunks!

This little stray who has captured my heart and attention…. I hope will be okay.

April 29th,Update on Little Black Stray

Well, we had sunshine for the morning anyway!  The skies are still a bit blue, temps are very comfortable, there’s a breeze stirring lightly over the land, and the little black stray was waiting for me this morning underneath large pine trees!  But before you get too excited, he ran like the dickens once he saw me and hid.

I just went over to check to see if he ate his breakfast, which he did, left him a couple bones.  It seems I’m not the only one obsessed about his safety.   Another resident stopped by, she had just been to the Vernon Police Dept. to inquire about a humane trap.  I had visited there yesterday.    There’s an all points bulletin out for this little critter and he is letting NO ONE near him!

Yesterday I got close enough to it to see his little face.  I went into the barn to bring breakfast, not thinking it would be there, and it was relaxing on a pile of hay.  Spooked, he ran off and hid.   I felt horrible that I had spooked him, and he hid for several hours.  When I went to feed him dinner, his lunch was still there.   The plan is now to borrow a cage from the next town over (animal control) and try to trap the little guy.  Sighs.  I’m nervous about this.   Very nervous.   But what I wanted to share was, his little face, his little body, there is something very familiar and special about this little guy.   I can’t put my finger on it, but it’s there.  Yes, I’m an animal lover, I would help any animal, but I wouldn’t adopt any animal.  This dog is special.  I pray that he will be alright and we’ll be able to rescue him.

Now I shall return to my chores, wait for the Police Dept to return my call.  Hmmm, my own dog is licensed this year, right??

April 30th  Update on Little Black Scooter

This morning I arrived earlier than usual to feed the little black stray.  He was no where to be found.  He had eaten all of his dinner, slept on the shirt that I had worn yesterday and left for him, and the special little bone with marrow in it that was placed on the shirt was gone.  At least I knew he had eaten.

After being away for hours I was anxious to get home to feed him dinner (I have been feeding him three times a day) and to hopefully spot him.  Because there is a very busy road between my house and where he is hanging out, I have to fight off fears.  Upon arriving home I thought I spotted him laying underneath the large pine trees where he was yesterday.  I came into my house, greeted my aussie, cats, then went over with his meal.  I now hum and sing a little as I walk over so he will know I’m on my way, I do not want to startle him like I did the other day.  He was there, underneath the trees watching me.  He didn’t run away right off!  I said “Hello little guy, I have you dinner!”  When I stopped to talk to him, he scooted off at a speed that a radar detector would have a hard time determining.  I prepared his meal, and came home, telling him his “meal is all ready for him” as I reached the top of the knoll to cross over the road to my house.

The idea of leaving my shirt was to leave my scent with him/her.  My ex and I had beagles that he used to hunt rabbits with.  Sometimes they would get off track and got lost so he would leave his shirt for them.  The next day he would go back and the beagle would be right there with the shirt.

Just a few minutes ago it was time to go over and leave his evening snacks.  He’s getting a bit fussy with his meals now!  He prefers the Cesar’s wet food over the Iam’s dry.  But as I was singing and humming and walking over I noticed he was closer to my house, and out in the open.  He didn’t run when he saw me, until I threw a bone at him and then he scooted off leaving dust flying behind him.  I left the bones on his bed, and on my way home I checked over where he was laying and… HE HAD STOLEN one of my dogs toys from my yard!   A bright green frog that says “rivet, rivet, rivet” when you toss it or squeeze it.  This made me smile!  My dog has so many toys he will not miss it, but the little guy wants to play, and he’s wanting some company.

As always I’m concerned that he had crossed the street to get to my house, but there isn’t anything I can do about this but pray for his safety and hope that he will trust me, come to me, and remain safe until then.

So, just wanted to share that Scooter is getting fussy with his food AND  he’s a thief!  He’s such a cute little guy!

It makes me smile to just think about him.

May 3rd, Scooters Little Brown Eyes

Late this afternoon I went out to feed the little guy/gal when I saw him coming up the driveway.  Knowing it is less intimidating to be squatting down or sitting, I sat down quickly on the ground.  When he spotted me I said in a very excited tone “Hi little guy, come see me” as I clapped my hands and made big of him.   He started to run towards me.  I kept blinking my eyes… Is this real?  Or am I dreaming.  He came to within 3′ then stopped and sat for a few seconds, a car went by (we were only about 20′ from the road), which startled him and he ran back 15′ or so.  For probably 30 minutes or more I talked to him, threw biscuits at him, getting him closer and closer, I had his favorite wet food in a dish as well.

The little guy has no collar, his face looks like that of a westie or schnauzer that has grown out, he has a white spot on his chest, and he’s more gray than black.  He is uncomfortable with fleas, I imagine, and has a hard time seeing through all the hair in his eyes.   As he got closer, I studied his eyes, he was eating from my hand but his eyes never looked away from mine.  I stroked his head with my other hand and he looked at me with an expression of uncertainty.  His little curls are matted with burrs, his paws have overgrown fur, but he ate from my hand!  Not only that, I picked him up and held him in my arms as I sat down, hoping to carry him across the road to my house, or slip the leash around his neck, but a truck went by and startled him, he wanted out of my arms, I held on, his back leg got caught in the pocket of my hooded sweatshirt and he cried a little.  He didn’t come near me after that.  I was so bummed.

I came back to my house, watching out the window and realized he/she is lonely, getting braver, hanging close to the road now, only 10′ or less away.  For the next 2 hours I sat out 20′ or more from him/her trying to entice it to come to me again, to no avail, being ever so careful to not call him or arouse him while traffic was going by.  Finally he went back down near the barn, much to my delight.  At least it gave me a sense of peace so that I could come in and pretend he/she was safe for now.

If you pray, I ask that you please say a prayer for this little guy/gal for his safety, and that he trusts me tomorrow, and will come to me again.  I am so worried that if I don’t catch him tomorrow, his newly found bravery and hanging out close to the road is going to end badly.

I will never forget those little brown eyes looking into mine as he was eating from my hand, as I stroked his head with my other hand.   He is such a very sweet dog, but he has been traumatized, or more, sadly.

As he walks away his little butt (cropped tail) wiggles back and forth.  It’s so cute.  This little black stray, he has spirit inside of him, I see it at times, when he steals Brody’s toys, when he throws caution to the wind and runs towards me to play, when I talk to him and he wiggles his butt and tail…  I just know his little spirit can come back to life if we can get him safe, clean, defleaed, comfy and in a home where he is loved like he should be….  I so hope this comes true.

May 3rd, One Step Forward, Three Steps Back, More on Scooter

This morning my little scooter was no where to be seen.  I left his breakfast, a few treats, and trudged home, sad that he no longer waits for me under the pine trees.  I decided to bring a blanket down and lay it near the pine trees, hoping that if I sit down there for a bit, he’ll come over and hang out.  He did not.  Nor did he show his face.

I positioned myself painting so that I could look out the window and see at least some of the area that he hangs in, watch for him.  Within a couple hours he showed up, his little trot with his butt shaking from side to side.  He was heading for the road.  The owner of the property was trying to scare him off from the road.  I grabbed some treats, a leash and headed out.  Surprisingly once I sat down on a log he came right over to me, but was very leary, watching me out of the corner of my eye as he was eating out of my hand.  I mistakenly grabbed for him, and was at the wrong angle, he yelped, whimpered and ran off… and I mean ran off.  I thought I would never see him again.  He ran about 40 ft, stopped and looked back, and then ran some more.  My heart broke and I felt awful.  I had lost his trust, and worst, he thought I was trying to hurt him too.

I came inside called a friend who is alongside of me with every effort of this rescue, she did not answer.  “I am so discouraged, I don’t think this is meant to be.  I think I have totally blown it and lost all his trust in me”, was what was left on her answering machine.  After I hung up I tried to paint, to focus on work.  I prayed to God to watch over him.  It crushed me to think that he thought I too betrayed him.  Tears fell down my cheeks onto my painting.   The painting is of Fire Island lighthouse so I figured, it’s applicable.  I prayed for strength, wisdom, on how to help this little guy.  At this point I thought it was time to hand it over to someone else, when trust is gone, what is left?   The phone rang, it was Connie “Donna, don’t give up, I know it’s discouraging, but you are doing your best.  You have to have patience.  You are going to have to let him trust you again.”  More tears.

He disappeared for hours after this.  There was no sign of his little head popping up in the field, he had not eaten his breakfast, Nada.  I had boiled some chicken breasts to cut up in small pieces.  I walked down and left a portion of this on a tray on the blanket, came home and started to paint again.  Within a few minutes I see his little black body climbing out of the wooded area and heading for the blanket.  I watched.  He sniffed all around, ate the chicken, then went into the tall grass and rolled on his back, playing.  It was actually so sweet to watch.  After several minutes he went back to the blanket, laid down and took a nap.  My heart started to heal and hope again.

A couple hours later I went out to check on things, give him his snack, he was walking down in the field.  “Well hello there little guy, come on, come here” as I sat down where I was, hoping he would come to me.  He slowly started to trot towards me, but for the first time I heard him talking.   He wasn’t wimpering or barking, he was moaning and chatty, like my Brody does when he’s lippy with me, or when he’s very happy.  This made me smile.  He came to within 4′ of me, I lifted my hand to throw a treat at him and this spooked him, he ran 20′ off and sat down.  We’re back to the stare.

I just went over to leave him dinner and snacks, and pick up my blanket.  He was in the field when he spotted me.  He stopped, sat, and watched.  I went to the barn, fixed his dinner, gave him fresh water, then went to the blanket, picked that up and left him a couple treats there.  As I was coming home I looked over and he was still in the same position watching me.  By the time I was in my house looking out the window he was at the blanket site, sniffing around, chowing down the snacks.  He then meandered over to the barn.  I think he was very happy with his entrees because he came up to the top of the driveway, sat there looking over at my yard.  I didn’t want to go out and upset him, but I watched in case he was getting too close to the road.  He moved closer to the road, so I grabbed some snacks and went outside where he did the usual…..the scooter stare.  As I walked towards him he ran back down the driveway, much to my delight, as he’s away from the road.

It’s been an up and down day today.  This is one smart little dog.  I am not sure that he would even fall for the cage trap.  He is more salt and pepper as I’ve gotten a closer look to him.  He has been neglected for some time.   Today when he was rolling on his back and playing in the field, I saw his little spirit come to life, I knew it was there all along.  It was also there when he came trucking up the driveway giving me lip.  It was as if he was saying “Don’t try to catch me, just be my friend you pain in the ass”.

I think he knows tonight that I’m not out to hurt him, but he does know I do have an agenda.  As hard as it is I’m going to let him come to me, and not reach for him, not grab him unless I am absolutely sure I have him 100%.  I do not want to scare him off again.  As he sits across the road looking over at my house I know he wants to befriend me, I know he wants to trust me, but his memory, his past, his smarts keep him at bay.   What a little dumpling this dog is…truly….  Dumpling or Dumplette?

May 4th, Rainy Day Stray

There was no sign of the lil guy this morning when I delivered food, though I saw him an hour or so later come out of the woods to gather his vittles.  At lunchtime I saw him again as he gathered under the pine trees for his chicken, then disappeared again and I haven’t seen him since.  I just walked over to the barn to leave him a snack… the bone I left is still there, it doesn’t look like he is sleeping on my shirt anymore, it doesn’t look like he’s spending anymore time in the barn, only as a stop by to eat.    Perhaps he’s found someplace else where they are giving him attention, or where he feels safe.  It is raining today, very hard, but he is not hanging around here.  Normally he would run out to get his food shortly thereafter I delivered it….. I am sad.

OMG, as I just wrote that I saw his head pop up over the knoll of the drive.   My heart is smiling.  He is running around sniffing, in the pouring rain.  If only he could understand what I want for him, it isn’t the life he has right now.    He just again came running up to the top of the drive, only feet from the road, looked across at my house for a few seconds, then headed back down towards the junk yard.   Oh, I see him going to the barn!  My goodness, how much this pooch has captured my heart!  And how much my 11 year old aussie is jealous!

I am THRILLED that he isn’t hanging out just mere feet from the busy road, this is answered prayers.  I hope the rest of my prayers will be answered.  This little guy/gal coming into my life has been a gift, really.    A reminder of how wonderful it feels to help another, particularly a being who cannot help themselves, and at a time when I myself feel kinda like a stray.  We’ve all felt that way at one time in our life or another.  Helping Scooter has really helped that feeling dissipate.

May 5th, Learning to Trust

Little black stray is now coming in my yard, has put his head in my hands a few times, and has eaten out of my hands, but still does not trust me to come to me to let me pick him/her up.  He/she will sit across the road and look over at my house.  When I go over to see it he will talk to me, run in circles, comes close, and then runs off.

I feel like we are running odds against the road, having lost a beautiful dog “Molly” to that same road years ago.  And now that he is crossing to come to my yard, gulps.   I become so frustrated, “if only you would trust me…. your itches would go away, your life would be so much better, I know what is better for you”… and then it hit me…  I am asking this little guy to trust me yet  I am not trusting in God.   I want to, I want to trust that my Will (the safety of this little furry creature will be rewarded) but I do not.

Who is learning to trust?  The little black stray or Donna?

May 5th, Scooterette

The little black stray is a girl, and she is on my porch, safe from traffic.

Praise to God for keeping her safe.  Thank you all who were praying for her safety.

Covered with ticks, fleas, masses of burrs, she is a beautiful little pepper colored terrier pup with the shiniest white teeth I’ve seen on an animal in years.

She squealed like a pig when I grabbed her, and I felt awful about betraying her trust, but I held firm and strong and walked quickly to my porch.    I am so grateful, so happy, so overwhelmed….

and I am teaching in 20 minutes!

Waiting for a call from my friend Jill who is going to groom her…. i yi yi….

Ma y 6th, Pics of Scooterette

The little black stray is a girl, and she is on my porch, safe from traffic.

Praise to God for keeping her safe.  Thank you all who were praying for her safety.

Covered with ticks, fleas, masses of burrs, she is a beautiful little pepper colored terrier pup with the shiniest white teeth I’ve seen on an animal in years.

She squealed like a pig when I grabbed her, and I felt awful about betraying her trust, but I held firm and strong and walked quickly to my porch.    I am so grateful, so happy, so overwhelmed….

and I am teaching in 20 minutes!

Waiting for a call from my friend Jill who is going to groom her…. i yi yi….

 

May 6th  On Love

Today I took Scooterette to the vet to have a general examination, and to be tested for Lyme and heart worm.  While she does not willingly jump into the car, she travels much better now, she trusts more.  Doc says she is healthy, weighs 18.5 lbs and her tests came back NEGATIVE!  She also received a Lyme & distemper vaccine.  This visit was possible from contributions made from friends and people who wanted to help.  Thank you!  After a 30 minute discussion with the vet (also a friend) who assured me that she would bond with Sue (my girlfriend who wants to adopt little black stray, and whom she is also friends with), and that it would be quicker and easier for her because she is now safe and living in a safe loving environment, I drove to where Sue worked to tell her the good news of her check up.  Sue (and a barrage of friends) came out to the car to see the little one.   They of course were told to please make big of Brody first!   Sue held her, and little black stray hugged her, as she did the night they met last week.   There is definately a connection there, and there is no doubt in my mind that she would have a wonderful home… and I would be able to see her whenever I wanted, plus she would have overnight visits here if they were going away.  Suddenly my decision was made.  Little black stray is going to become Sue’s little girl.  It felt like the right thing to do for all.  Doc Brown had made suggestions on how to make the transition, and I’ve no doubt that when the time comes I will cry my eyes out, this little shadow is so sweet, and loving, and looks at me like I am a goddess (Hey I said she was sweet and loving, I didn’t say she was the brightest dog in the world!).  I will still be part of her life.  Sue said we could be Mommy1 and Mommy2.  I laugh at that but I do like the idea.  How hard this is going to be, and even writing about this, as good of a decision I know this is for all, the tears fall down my cheeks, I will miss this little soul in my home.  How much I have learned from her in the mere 3 weeks we’ve been in each others life.     If for some unforeseen reason it does not work out, she will come back to live with me, but I see no reason why this would happen.  Believe me when I tell you, she will be doted on, loved and pampered as she should be.  And she will have a fluffy old brother named Bailey (or Boo Boo) who I’m sure they will get along fine.  Now the only thing we need to work on is  her hubby allowing the little one in bed…. she needs cuddling, and while she doesn’t take up much space nor is she bossy or controlling like Brody when it comes to space, this is an absolute for her.  She needs to know she is loved, and snuggling is important to her.

Strangely enough the cats started coming back on the bed last night, they are comfortable with her now, she is accepted here.  I think she likes being part of a zoo.   I am going to talk about it during this blog and then probably not for a few days except with Sue because it hurts too much.   Five animals is too much for me to care for, and when I say care for, I mean give the single attention that each deserve, and the care that they deserve.  A commitment to this little angel who is believed to be only 2 years old, I just cannot do with 100%.  My life is changing, my animals are all seniors, and with past health issues I just don’t know what my future holds (do any of us, really?)  She deserves to be in a stable environment where she has lots of area to play, without the threat of the road, or constant juggle from when I travel.  Enough said.  This little black angel.

It amazes me how our hearts are capable of so much love.  Having so much love for my four animals, and Brody who has thought he is an only child now for almost 11 years, who is very demanding and possessive of me, he also let her in, played with her, was amused by her, and was gentle with her.  I believe he knew she needed us.   I am proud of that bossy aussie.   The human heart is just amazing, I never knew how much I could love and how it doesn’t take away from one to love another.  If our hearts are open the capacity of love for each of us is enormous, more than we could ever imagine.  We surprise even ourselves.  The human heart, our immense capacity to love and the depth to which we love is such an amazing gift.  I said to a friend the other day, oh how my definition of love has changed over the years, and God willing, I wonder how I will define it years from now.

May 8t h, Her First Night in Bed

Scooterettes first night in a bed was pretty sweet.  She has taken to this lap quilt that a friend has made for me, so I placed that on the bed beside me.  I placed her on that where she came as close to me as she could, paws on my arm and chest, and just stared at me for several minutes.  Brody was unaffected, he has his 8″ therapeutic bed on the floor, had his fill of bedtime snacks and fell fast asleep.  Scooterette ate her snacks, snuggled in, stared, then fell fast asleep.  She didn’t move for several hours.  In fact, I was able to pick her up and reposition her without waking her.  When I was awakened 4 hours later to Brody nudging me that he needed out but SOON, she was in the same position, sound asleep.    I didn’t want to disturb her, so I took Brody out.  When we came back she was waiting at the top of the stairs, head cocked waiting for us.  She had peed on the floor, but that is my fault as I didn’t take her out.  Since that episode she goes out with Brody (without a leash), sticks by my side, does her duties and comes in right behind me.

Yesterday I had a funeral to attend.  I wasn’t comfortable leaving her alone with Brody and the three cats, so I put her in the cellar where she had spent her first night.  I’m not sure if I mentioned this earlier but when I moved into this house I cut a cat hole in the old door so that the cats could get down into the cellar to their kitty litter.  Well, it ended up being big enough for our beagles to fit through!  Anyway, the first night she was here I blocked the opening by lightly nailing in a 12 x 12 piece of cork that I had hanging around.  It worked well.    When I arrived home from the funeral little Miss Scooterette was sitting in the livingroom amongst the other furries, just sitting there like she belonged there.  She plowed her way through the barrier!  I found this rather comical.

Because it took me so long to catch her I had taken her out with a harness and leash that a friend had given me the first day.  All she did was sit down and look up at me.  Yesterday after seeing how comfortable she was in the house and how she was making herself to home, I decided to take her out without a leash.  I carried her out to the back hill where Brody and I play frisbee and set her down.  At first she was unsure.  She would walk a few feet then run back to me.  After a few minutes she was more comfortable roaming a little bit.   When it came time to come inside she followed us in.   No longer was she putting her feet up and asking you to lift her up on the couch, she suddenly could spring up beside you.

Now she goes in and out with Brody.  It’s rather cute.    It was only a couple days ago where she was afraid to come to me and now she is running in and out with ease and comfort.

I haven’t decided what her fate will be.  I have a couple of friends who would provide wonderful homes for her.   I love this little dog, she is very sweet and while I find it endearing that she is settling in so quickly and I love how much she trusts me and loves me, I have to think about this realistically.  I can barely feed the mouths of the furries I do have.   When they need medical care, it is a hardship.  My work has me traveling a lot and finding care for one dog let alone two has its challenges.  I am also considering a geographic move, so, I just don’t think it is in her best interest or mine to stay here.  Though I know it will be hard to let her go.  But I have learned in life, we have to let go of everything, and when you love someone or something, you do what is best for them.  Either way I will be able to see her and visit her often.  I’m placing the resolution in God’s hands.

I wanted to share with you that yesterday afternoon, the third time we went out to play frisbee with Brody, her eyes were filled with life.  They were not sad, they were not unsure or weary.  This made me happy.  Tomorrow or Tuesday she will be getting her grooming, to which I’m sure she’ll feel extra special!   My girlfriend and I have been hacking off the curls (thus masses).  She doesn’t mind, and she looks rather raggedy, but so much better than she looked 2 days ago!

 

May 9th    A bit of trauma turned to more trust

This morning I was racing around to get ready to run to town, Monday morning errands.  Brody loves to go for rides.  So, let’s see if Scooter wants to join us.   Brody jumped in the car, Scooterette ran towards the car, then stopped.  Unsure, she ran in circles.  Then she put her front paws up to me like she does when she wants me to pick her up.  When I went to do that she screamed and fought.  She did NOT want to get in the car.  Perhaps a memory of the last time she was in one?  I picked her up, kissed her, brought her in the house, gave her some treats, and Brody and I headed out on errends.

A couple of hours later we arrive home.  This is the first time she has been left alone with the cats.  I expected her to greet us at the door, she did not.  I call for her, no Scooterette.  I clap my hands, no pup.  Now I am beginning to get nervous.  I put the groceries down, walked around the first floor, as I walked back into the kitchen, there she stood, head down, shaking.  I think she thought we abandoned her.  I picked her up, kissed her, held her, then put her down so as not to make too big of a deal about it.  “Time to go out!”  With that Brody grabbed his frisbee and the little one RACED out the door.    She ran up the back hill faster than she ever has, and she was running in circles, full of life.  She was in fact, relieved.  I have earned a bit more trust with her.   As Brody played frisbee, she raced in circles, reminding me of Snoopy.  I smiled.

We came in, I unpacked all the groceries, fed all the animals and presented the dogs with their bones.  Brody had a big bone, she had a matching mini bone.  They both ran into the livingroom, sat down and chowed them down.

I expected that she might not to go in the car.  I didn’t know what to do, whether to try it or not.  I decided to try it.  I got my answer clearly.  I don’t want to believe that someone dropped this little love off, I prefer to believe that perhaps she got out of the car when someone was traveling…. though why weren’t they looking for her?  It really doesn’t matter, what matters is that she’s safe, she’s continually being reassured of that, and I am truly enjoying the tiny pitter pat of her footsteps behind mine.

Her past will probably always be there for her as a reminder, but I will do everything in my power to assure that her future is filled with sunshine, love and good vittles so that her visitation to her past pain is kept to a minimum, just as I do in my own life.

Have a great day!

 

May 12    Quiet

The sun is shining, it is an absolutely beautiful day here in Vermont.   An early doctors appointment where I learned I have two trigger fingers.  One shot of cortisone, prescription for hand therapy and massage therapy on my shoulders and chest (effects from the double mastectomies) and I’m good to go.  I love my orthopedic surgeon.  She is full of life, sunshine, always offers a smile, good cheer.  She rocks!

I have been considering giving myself a gift now for months.  It is not materialistic in nature, but something I would give myself that would improve my overall health, help me to feel better on a daily basis,  and that which has been an Achilles heel in my life for years.  As my reconstruction draws to a close and 50 coming up at the end of the year, I want to do this for myself, I am ready.  I’m not sure if I can swing it, quite honestly I don’t think I can, but I feel so strongly about it that I am going to figure out a way.  The old saying “Where there is a will, there is a way”.  I wonder if there is zoning for a red light district in my town?  KIDDING!  Decisions, decision, so many decisions.

Speaking of decisions, as the little one lays here near my feet I have yet to decide if I am going to give her up.  I just adore her, she is an absolute love.  She behaves, has fit into the home without much adjustment…I just don’t know.  My biggest fear is by giving her up she will think that I too abandoned her.  That would break my heart.  I promised her she would never be abandoned again.  When I make a commitment to an animal its for life.  My Brody is 11 next month, my cats are all older than that.  What is best for her?  What is best for me?  Still praying.  I know I should make the decision soon so she isn’t too settled here if the decision is for her to go.  And it isn’t like I wouldn’t see her again…  Still, not an easy decision.  Never did think about what I’d do with her if I caught her!  I know I have said this before.

It’s quiet here.  The passing of an occasional car, other than that I hear birds chirping, cats snoring, it is so peaceful.  I remember a time in my life when I needed background noise, distractions.  Loud music, television, and while I still like both, I also appreciate the peacefulness and calmness of quiet times.   Some of my relaxing time is driving, this is why I love to travel.  No phones, no distractions, it’s time to reflect, to finally breathe in deeply all that has been happening since my last travel gig.  Time to talk to God, to myself, to listen, to observe what is going on in the world outside of my tiny little busy world in Vernon, VT.  It is so easy to get lost in your own world.  Though I never thought I would say this, I have interest in the news now, and have for the past year.   Some of it I cannot watch, but I know more about world events than I ever knew in my life…and what a time to be aware!  NOT!

So, now it’s time to put some background music or television on, pick up the paintbrush and get back to work.   No sense focusing too much on decisions, I believe the answers will come as they are supposed to.  Obsessing about them will only cause anxiety which will bring along with it an influx of negative things.  Onward!  Here’s to a good day for all!

 

 

May 20th     To Thine Own Gut, Be True

For those of you who have been following the saga of Scooter, or little black stray, I had made the painstaking decision to give her up.  The good news was she was going to a good friend who would have provided her with a wonderful home, pampered her, and taken very good care of her.  On Wednesday night my girlfriend Sue brought her husband and other pooch, Bailey to meet her.  All went well.   Their Bailey is also a rescue dog, he’s one of those Hollywood looking dogs, shaggy, just beautiful and an absolute love.   I thought the meeting went very well, it seemed like this was a good match, not surprising to me.  What transpired after for me, however, was not usual.  Once I make a decision I usually forge ahead with it, I do not look back or question whether I’ve made the right decision.   Mostly because I don’t make snap decisions, I put much care and thought into things, just as I did with this situation.    That night my gut churned, I had a sleepless night, tossing and turning, I could not find peace, could not get rest, was consumed with this.  Was I wrong to let her go?  Surely I didn’t want to let her go but I had to be realistic, as stated from a friend in a post earlier this week, this economy has forced many of us to make decisions we would rather not make, why was this one so hard when I knew she was going to a wonderful home, that I would be able to see her, and it seemed this was the best decision for all?

In the early morning I emailed my girlfriend to tell her that I was feeling just awful, had I made a mistake?  Was I supposed to keep her?  Apologizing, explaining that my intent was not to hurt her, the little one or myself.  I received back the most beautiful reply in which brought me happy tears.  First, to be understood, second to be treated with love and respect and acceptance for who I am as a person, indecisiveness and all, and third, with no judgment whatsoever.  She spoke about how the little one looks at me, and how I react to her, there is definately a bond, and that unfortunately there were many many dogs out there that needed to be rescued and adopted, that she loved the little one, could visit her, was good with it all.

So little girl, scooter, little black stray is going to stay with me and my other four animals.  As I roll my eyes and think of how many pets I have, a single woman barely making ends meet taking in yet another critter, I know that somehow it will all work out.   She has just fit into my home without adjustment, she is accepted by the other furries, with some hissing from one cat if she corners her, but that’s really nothing.  Her little personality is starting to come out now that she is safe, and her trust in me continues to be proven worthy.   She has found her home, her family.   For this I am so grateful and happy and a bit whacked as surely now I will be “the lady with all the animals”.

I enjoy my animals very much.   They bring me a tremendous amount of joy and they truly amuse me.   It makes me feel good to know that I provide for them, that they have a good home, good eats, and that they “live the life of riley”.    This makes me feel good about me.

Did you know that pets actually cut down on stress?  This was another question in the Real Age test I took the other day.  I am recalling a certain episode of the comedy “Wings” where Roy Biggins was stressed to the max and his doctor gave him a fake animal to stroke, pet, when he was stressed and he pulled that thing out and would pet pet pet pet it.  Was a very comical episode as were most of them.    Another destresser for me is children.  Amazing how much joy and amusement I receive from children.   And for those of us who bore no children, our furries are ours.

A special Thank you to Maddy, Sue, Robyne, Beth & Judy for your kindness and generosity and willingness to help.  Much love to you all.