It’s the wee hours of morning. Many of my friends are just rising. This is my favorite time of day. I guess because it’s very quiet, I’m seldom if ever interrupted by the phone, and my creativity screams from 10pm-4am. So many have expressed their concerns, that I’m isolating, which may be true, but truly, this is a peaceful time for me.
The cat is asleep, I hear her little snore in between the lulls of music. My studio is in the usual disarray that happens with winds of creativity. I’ve got two stacks of messy bun hats that are holding up the rooster and turtle paintings, and my large painting table is covered, every inch. It’s awesome. When I go into the kitchen to fill my glass with drink, I look at the pile of dishes and smile. It will end. Eventually this streak will come to close, or slow anyway, and the dishes will eventually get done!
So many of my friends are struggling, or have been with health issues. I offer prayers for them whenever I think of them, or see their posts. I slept and rested today, watching some old television programs on Netflix. But at 10pm, my mind was thinking of color, texture, and ways to paint certain pieces, effects.
Earlier today when I fell asleep on the couch, I had a dream that recurs. It’s a painful dream, and I always wake up feeling breathless, and sad. So I did what I have learned to do, and that is, not run from it, but honor it, and not dissect every bit of it, but lightly think about why now? Sometimes the answer comes, sometimes it doesn’t. I’m grateful this dream is not nearly as frequent as it used to be. And I’ve come to accept I’ll probably have it for life, unless somehow I find resolution. But there is no resolution. The best way I knew how to shake it off was with a brush in hand.
I must admit when I rose today I wasn’t thrilled to see it snowing. As I walk in my yard it’s hard to believe that I will ever see ground again, but I will. And in Spring when new life grows, and I see the beginning of plants and perennials that survived the winter, I forget all about the tons of white shit that right now fill my yard and block off about 1/3 of my normal driveway.
So, this is where my thoughts are. On painting, on new beginnings, and sadly, some endings. It is what it is.
I’m seriously considering taking some classes, art related, maybe even a writing class to get me seriously actively pursuing a lifelong dream.
Plans to stay up all day today, and try to curve myself back into the schedule of the majority of the world. We shall see how that goes.
Peace to you,