I’m sitting in my oncologists office in the fast paced city of Boston. A routine checkup, I have every 6 months. The trip down was uneventful, unless you count construction and detours and a LOT of rain! As I was driving down I wondered what my kid sister would say or think of how much I’ve grown. Once petrified of driving in unknown places, you can only imagine the anxiety that would consume my thoughts when I had to drive in Boston. Well, long gone are THOSE days! My sister was my main encourager, my witness in life. She was also a mighty fine driver when it came to driving me into places I dared not enter! Five years ago my fear of driving in Boston ended when I was making weekly visits for breast reconstruction. Long gone I tell you, Long gone! I will now share with you the “survivor skills” of driving in Boston. First, play your favorite music and very loud! This is calming and also means you cannot hear others honking at you! Second, wear sunglasses! This way they do not get eye contact with you so the majority of them will not risk getting into an accident and third? Have a gps. It may loop you around and around like musical chairs, but it can offer a sense of confidence.
On the elevator coming up to the 9th floor in the Yawkey Building at Massachusetts General Hospital I shared the elevator with a nice looking young man, I would guess in his 30’s. He asked if I was having a good day. I replied “Yes! Today my oncologist is going to tell me I’m still cancer free!” He smiled the widest grin and said “Alright!!!!!!!” He opened his arms to hug me and I obliged. “Do you believe in God?” he asked. My reply, “I don’t walk a step without him!”. What a nice encounter!
The sweetest woman just came over to offer me refreshments. We had the nicest chat. Pushing the refreshment cart around in a cancer treatment center as large as this, I’m sure she has seen much. God bless her. I know her sweet smile has always brought a smile to my face over the years. I’m sure without even knowing it, she has helped many. Her smile, her kindness makes a difference in the world! Never underestimate the power of a smile, a friendly gesture!
My oncologist is running an hour behind, no big deal. I said a prayer for those she is helping, and for the emergency this morning that backed up her appointments. It could be ME in there! Take all the time you want, Dr. Kuter. You will hear no disappointing words from me! I love my oncologist. She is a wonderful person and likewise, doctor. Never rushes you out, sits as long as you need her to answer questions, etc. Besides, this hour gives me a chance to jot down my thoughts, write this blog.
As mentioned above I have experienced much growth. I can tell you that I wouldn’t wish the journey of cancer on anyone, but I wouldn’t trade my personal growth for the world. I’ve learned that it’s the toughest times that bring the most growth and when you come out of it, it’s amazing how perspective changes, at least that is how it is with me. As I sit here looking around at the people sitting in this waiting room it’s obvious, no one wants to be here. No one. But you make the best of what you’ve got, if you’re smart that is! Sometimes I had to stoop very low to experience humility, thus gratitude. These days I’m grateful every day for so many things and even in that I know there is so much more I should be grateful for!
I am writing this blog on my iphone. I am hardly efficient with this keyboard. I probably should proof this blog but its time to close it. A young woman who is looking mighty scared just arrived and sat near me. I think it’s time to give back what was given to me. I remember the fear I had when I first walked into this hospital. I remember, also, the kindness of others, the seasoned “survivors” who shared their story with me and brought some solace to a restless mind and soul. If the auto correct has done it’s job I am sure there will be major errors. Just know if it said something about a sex change, it’s not true! My oh my how messed up auto correct can be, but it can add a lot of spice too!
I sure hope you are having a great day. I am! Today my oncologist is going to tell me I’m still cancer free! Can it get any better than that?