Creative Storm Donna hit my house this morning, unexpectedly. I canNOT believe how upside down my house got in a matter of 12 hours! I’ll be sucking up to my mom tomorrow “why don’t you come down and grill out with me?” She’ll walk into the kitchen, her jaw will drop and she will know instantly that I am in “the mode”. When I am in this mode, which I haven’t been in months, or almost a year, I eat, sleep, breathe the project I’m working on. Who has time for dishes? Putting away food? Throwing away empty packages?
Creativity is indeed a gift, but like anything else in life it can also be a curse. Ya got to know when to walk away, and then the times when you are uninspired, well, I feel worthless then. This is when I have to remind myself that I’m a human being, not a human doing.
Today I have been thinking about, and talking to friends about Faith. Everyday we drive on public roads we have blind faith that the other drivers are paying attention, obeying the laws of driving…and if we are wise, we also drive defensively. Do we recognize how many cars whizzed by us without incident? Are we grateful when we walk into our homes after work and can sit in our favorite chair to relax?
Today I was reminded of a dream, which I later and have since described as a “spiritual awakening”. I do not know where I was, but I knew it was a privilege to be there, and I wouldn’t be there long. I was shown this room with thousands upon thousands of books, all beautifully guilded with gold, silver, copper, impressed into beautiful leather. These books were all different sizes, some very thick, some very small with few pages. It was magical. I watched as entities opened a book and “watched” the story of someone’s life shown from birth to death right before their eyes and in mere seconds. What stood out to me was the delicate, intricate weavings that were represented in these stories…a simple smile at some stranger; a good deed. The larger life events in our minds eye were not shown with the same significance as was placed while we walked on and breathed air from earth.
I was shown the significance of every gesture, every person we meet, every action we take makes up the story of our lives. There are no coincidences, no accidents, which can be very hard to comprehend and have faith in when someone you love has just passed, or something you wished or prayed for did not happen. Does that mean our prayers were unanswered? Or does it mean they were, just not to our liking? While “visiting” there I felt so light, so airy, and the man in a long plush robe with large sleeves told me I could ask two questions. I knew I should have written this down when I woke up (I used to keep paper and pen by my bed, but as my skin is losing its elasticity, my memory flies away with a subtle breeze) I knew I had been blessed with this experience. The one question I do remember asking was “Why are animals (pets) lives so short?” It was explained to me that in an average persons life we would have 3-5 pets. Experiencing their deaths, as hard as it is, helps us to accept death, readies us for our own and loved ones deaths.
I often think of those books. How beautiful that room was, how jam packed yet each book displayed like masterpieces of art, and they were…each book represented the masterpiece of a life. The smaller books which represented shorter lives were those with the most blessings, as their purpose(s) were strongly met in a shorter span, but that didn’t mean their lives held any less significance, or the love they received and gave was any less than one with a larger book, thus longer life. In fact, it really appeared to be much happier. When you opened the front cover, magically the words began to show a movie script, and the reader/watcher was granted the reasons why things happened the way they did, one of the very things we wish for here on earth. We aren’t meant to understand them here, but one day we will.
Faith is easy to hold onto when things are going well. We travel long distance, arrive safely. Our lives are filled with blind faith on a minute to minute basis. Where we struggle is when things aren’t going the way we want them too, when difficulties fall into our path. This is when our faith is tested, but remember above? There are no coincidences, no mistakes, everything has purpose and meaning. In past my Faith has flown out the window quickly when someone I loved died, or even when someone was cruel or unfair to me or someone I loved. Fortunately, though imperfectly, my Faith is much stronger today. As the shadows of clouds cover the sunshine and I feel the coldness of life, I try very hard to remember and TRUST that the clouds will move, allowing sunshine back in again. Sometimes opened back up with the most beautiful gardens laid out in front of us. I have learned that we have to keep an open mind and be willing to accept. Without acceptance we shall find no peace or serenity. How do you handle life when things go awry? Do you pray? Do you trust in God or a higher power of your understanding? Or do you turn your back to him/her/it in anguish?
Today I am grateful for my Faith, and the beautiful places that arose by taking leaps of Faith. Yes, my actions and choices do play a big part in the story of my life, but ultimately there is a devine being in charge of it all, for this I believe.
Have a great day!