Beacon of hope


We are enjoying blue blue skies, fallen leaves, brisk Fall weather here in Vermont today.  The chills from the cold are blanketed with warmth from the sun beaming down, kissing our bodies, our faces…  What a nice change from the cold, dark and dreary days we’ve had of late.  We all need light, we need the sun but with anything it is in moderation.  Do you know that most women in New England are Vitamin B3 deficient?  It is recommended that every woman be on 2000u of Vitamin B3 a day for feminine health…per my oncologist at Dana Farber.   I have shared this information with several women who have indeed found, they were B3 deficient as well.

As Maureen McGovern is singing “There’s got to be a morning after” in the background I am reminded of how things can change not just on a day to day basis, but certainly moment to moment.  Hope changes.  This warm beautiful day has renewed my hope, warmed up my soul to hopefully carry me through more storms.

I opened the shutters to the classroom windows so that my cats could also enjoy the warmth and healing of the sun, having just found new places to cuddle up and snuggle in.  I’ve pushed all curtains open as far as they could to encourage and allow the warmth and light from today’s sunshine in.    Wouldn’t it be nice if we could somehow trap it in our homes?  And now “What a wonderful world” is playing…. I smile.

I received several emails with concern about how tired I have been lately.   All with very loving and good advice which I appreciate.   Reminders to not be so hard on myself, and also one that asked if I had my iron levels checked lately, which is verbatim what my mother has been telling me for two weeks.  I will be following up on this with my Dr in a couple weeks when I see her.  In the meantime I’m rejoicing in today’s welcoming and snuggly warm weather, the good news that my liver counts are back to normal after several months, including my thyroid!

There are some things I need to take action on, things that will or should make my life easier, less stressful in some ways.   I just haven’t had the energy to do so.  Today I’m entertaining the idea of making those changes and taking action today.    Why is it sometimes so hard to just begin?  I know I’m not alone here.   If I have deadlines to meet (which I do right now), I will wait until the very end to complete them, thus creating unnecessary stress on myself.  I’ve been working on getting better with this (having started work a few days ago on deadlines for Nov 1st), but I’m finding it isn’t just work I procrastinate with.   For a long time procrastination worked as a great motivator to me, it still can, but I’m resigned to let go of undo stress and demands, particularly those that I’ve inflicted on myself.

I’m letting the sun bore a hole in the anxiety rooted deep within me.    I had a really nice dream this morning about a friend I haven’t seen in years, and the dream was very sweet and included my brother.  I woke up smiling, light hearted and happy.  Don’t ya just love it when that happens?  I taught a class this morning where one of my friends/students just came back from the depths of lung cancer.   It was so nice to see her, to know she is cancer free and back to doing things, back to living, as I believe sometimes when you are sick you can go into survival or action mode, medical issues can be all consuming and draining.   I’m glad she’s getting a break and I hope its a LONG stretch before she has any health issues again.  I love that I support and encourage a small women’s group, sharing with each other both the good and difficult parts of their lives, sharing experience, strengths, hope.  We all learn from one another, and to support one another, well… it doesn’t get much better than that.

Here’s to hope, to friends, to family, to past friends revisited, to warmth, to life…and here’s to you!  Have a GREAT day!



About anartistslife

Through the many trials, triumphs and tribulations of my life, I share my stories to help others. I share my thoughts to perhaps bring a new point of view to my readers, and I share my opinions because I just have better ideas! ♥♥! Where would we be without humor?

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